(Insert Cliche)
Hello my name is (insert name). I am an attractive (insert color) male in search of a (insert mammal) who is smart, beautiful and witty. If you like (insert adjective men who enjoy (insert sexual act) then look no further. Shouldn't dating be (insert synonym for fun)?

Can't describe the first date because it would be different for everyone. Tell me what you like, we'll probably do that. If I don't agree to take you somewhere you want to go, you probably shouldn't go.

Seriously, here's a hint: I like coffee, cooking, listening and relaxing.

And my match must be a woman who is a kindred spirit of the arts. I play piano all the time, if you don't like the sound, best not respond.