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Profession puppeteer, consultant & gadfly
Do you want children? Undecided/Open
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Interests
| practicing to be an old miser | leaving pies to cool in windsills to lure hobos to their doom | posting fraudulant profiles on internet personal sites | | pondering the Schleswig-Holstein Question | staring intensly at people on the bus while muttering the lyrics of Windmills of Your Mind | |
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About Me
I'm short, caucasian & nerdy, which this means about 93% of you are annoyed that I even exist. 5% want me sent to a concentration camp along with all the other short men of the world, and the other 1% apparently desires some kind of internet death ray that would kill me if I deigned to contact you, this is NOT hyperbole & I have the hateful emails to prove it. I abuse the hell out of caffeine, I can be a smart-ass (I'm a comedian so I need to practice), don't know beans about cars but I can go for hours about trivial geek subjects (think of me as a snarky version of the nerds from "Big Bang Theory")
In my defense I am debt free, pay my taxes, make a livable wage, never been arrested, never used drugs, don't smoke, no kids, no "crazy ex-wife", I'm a favorite "honorary" uncle to my friends children & I rarely drink.
My life is pretty fun and I'm looking to share with someone of equal zeal, a true woman of possessing intelligence, irreverence, & independence. A fearless spirit of adventure with an equally fearless sense of humor. I enjoy the endangered art of conversation & friendly debate over subjects both relevant and trivial and I'd like to find someone who enjoys the same, this is of course impossible...
Oh yeah, last time I checked "pampered" means you wear diapers & "spoiled" means you are rotted. So if you like to be either of those, do NOT contact me!
If you are still chasing the captain of your high school football team why not use Facebook to track him down instead of POF? You'll do all of us a favor!
Run along now, your tattooed 6'4 Harley ridin' ex-marine fireman is waiting for you to tell him to beat me up...do not expect me to believe otherwise..
First Date
Go for a candlelight dinner, I myself do not eat candles but a LOT of women on here seem to enjoy it (I'll have a steak, medium rare please). Then go for a long walk on the beach where hopefully we will not be attacked by rabid dolphins. If they do, I am ready to fend them off with my trusty yo-yo, which I have a black belt in.
But of all that is a bit much, a cafe mocha at Starbucks works too...
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