A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards. The little boy asked why he wore his collar backwards...




The man, who was a priest, said "I am a Father." The little boy replied "My Dad doesn't wear his collar like that." The priest looked up from his book and answered "I am the Father of many."




The boy said "My Dad has 4 boys, 4 girls and two grandchildren and he doesn't wear his collar that way." The priest, getting impatient, said "I am the Father of hundreds" and went back to reading his book.




The little boy sat quietly thinking for a while, then leaned over and said, "Maybe you should use a condom and wear your pants backwards instead of your collar.

APHORISM: A SHORT, POINTED SENTENCE EXPRESSING A WISE OR CLEVER OBSERVATION OR A GENERAL TRUTH.
1. The nicest thing about the future is that it always
starts tomorrow.
2.. Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will make
him wag his tail.
3. If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably don't
have any sense at all.
4. Seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs.
5. A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in
deep water.
6. How come it takes so little time for a child who is
afraid of the dark to become a teenager who wants to stay
out all night?
7. Business conventions are important because they
demonstrate how many people a company can operate without.
8. Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than
everyone else looks?
9. Scratch a cat and you will have a permanent job.
10. No one has more driving ambition than the boy who wants
to buy a car.
11. There are no new sins; the old ones just get more
publicity.
12. There are worse things than getting a call for a wrong
number at 4 AM. - Like this: It could be a right number.
13. No one ever says 'It's only a game.' when their team is
winning.
14. I've reached the age where the happy hour is a nap.
15. Be careful reading the fine print. There's no way you're
going to like it.
16. The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has
the same size bucket.
17. Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have
thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos?(And rap
music will be the Golden Oldies!
18. Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more
comfortable to cry in a Corvette than in a Yugo
19. After 60, if you don't wake up aching in every joint,
you are probably dead!

Always be yourself. Because the people that matter, don't
mind. And the one's that mind, don't matter.

Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.