So, about me, Im a huge hockey fan, I also play quite a bit. I love the mountains, camping, hiking, etc. Havent been skiing for a long time, but would love to get into that again. Long motorcycle rides are awesome! I like food! Cooking, trying new recipes, more like "experimenting" with them, finding a great new restaurant. I also like Sid and Marty Kroftt shows, were those guys high or what?!(remember? Land of the Lost, Dr. Shrinker, Sigmund the Sea Monster, Far Out Space Nuts, H.R. Puffenstuff, Electra woman and Dyna girl)

Ummm, I like tatoos, havent decided on one for myself yet. I like to laugh and make people laugh. I also like midget wrestling. Midgets in general, or little people..Dwarves? Whatever they like to be called. But only the slim fingered ones, not the fat sausage kind.
I kill the spiders. I put the seat down. I wear my pants around my waist, NOT my thighs, or my ribs for that matter. And I believe meat is murder! DELICIOUS MURDER! I read without moving my lips. I can tell the difference between butter and "I cant believe it's not butter"

Ok, music. I like almost everything. ZZ Top, Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, John Mayer, Prince, Beethoven, Mozart, Johnny Cash, Van Halen, Police, Beastie Boys, Jimi Hendrix, Cake, Billy Joel, Joe Satriani, Beatles, Weezer, Steve Vai, Bob Dylan, G-love and special sauce, Chickenfoot...

I love scary movies. Good ones, not the lame movies that try to keep you interested with suspense, then end up not giving you enough information before it mysteriously ends. Mainly the classics, Shining, Amittyville horror, The Omen, Omen 2, Exorcist, Carrie, and I have a soft spot for the Chucky movies. COmedies are good, too. Dumb and Dumber, One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest, 40 year old virgin, any of the
Kevin Smith films.

Turn offs:
Eyebrows that are plucked completely off, then repainted with a sharpie marker.
girls who are seeking a "partner in crime" ugh! wow you are so EDGY
The word ointment
IMPLANTS! Your boobs are supposed to move, ladies!
BIG pointy facial piercings
little dogs that are carried in purses
those HIDEOUS sunglasses/ski goggles, is that fad over yet? Dont hide your beautiful face behind pork chop sized lenses! Just because Britney Spears does it doesnt make it a good idea!
Brazilian waxes. I prefer a little grass in the outfield HA!
degrading bumper stickers
Those damn thorny things that always pop your bike tires!
Itches that cant be scratched
Women who say "What's THAT for?" when I grab the Redi-whip from the fridge as we head to the bedroom

Turn ONS:
Good manners
Good kissers
Women who put the seat UP when they are done, at least at my house.
When I walk past a woman and her perfume hits me a couple seconds later, and I stop in my tracks and turn around, cuz it just smells SO damn good!.
That "come hither" look from across a crowded room.
Long, dark hair
matching underwear
Women who go easy on the pepper spray
painted nails, including your toes.
biting my lip(you, not me)
nails down my back
A girl who brings her own handcuffs


So...I see a lot of pics of you ladies in the driver seat of your car. AMAZING! Not only do you apply make up, text, chat with your friends, read Cosmo and drink Starbucks all while driving, you pose for pictures, too! I love it!


What I am looking for is a smart, decent woman. Fun, witty, and not too many cats. Someone true to herself, and the people in her life, be it friends, family, or even ME!(duh) Someone with a job, a car(or motorcycle), and hopefully her own place. God knows I havent got room for any spare toothbrushes at my house! Above all, she MUST have a sense of humor and an appreciation for a guy who will treat her well. Willing to try new things, nothing crazy or freaky just a good sense of adventure and FUN! And not get all cranky when I wanna do guy stuff on occasion. So... while you wait for someone better to come along, why not humor me and say HI?

Come on, ladies! LOWER YOUR STANDARDS!

A first date would have to be simple, short and sweet. Coffee? Beer? A bike(read motorcycle) ride and a bite to eat? Bowling? Mini golf? Dwarf tossing? Of course something fun that would allow us to get to know each other. We could always go to the mall and watch Mexican babies get their ears pierced.