Hey there. I just wanted to let you know that that guy who emails you right after me? He sucks. Really. He doesn’t deserve to get the time of day from a princess like yourself. Listen, my schedule is super busy but I think you may be worth a shot. If you’re not interested in a sexy, successful man, I’m sure there are plenty of losers like that other guy in your mailbox...

Just playing. That should weed out the humorless and easily offended. And if that kind of ridiculous machismo excites you then now would be the time to hit the back button because we probably don't have a lot in common. You should know you want to chat with me based on my pictures and interests, and if you don't... go to hell lady! Just playing again, but in any event, I'm 26, have my life together, and am more than the usual amount of funny and interesting, so you better like to laugh.