I am straight-forward and to the point. Why waste my time or yours? I am not really looking for a 'realationship' - I just got out of one of those and I'm not hot to do that again any time soon. I'm mainly kinda looking for a 'freind with benefits' - stressing the FRIEND part. I do not do 'one night stands' or annonymous sex - that's just not me. Despite how forward I might seem right now, I am actually a pretty shy person around the opposite sex, so it's very important that I feel comfortable around you in a friendly way. I also don't dig guys who are TOO 'sex driven' and blunt about sexual stuff - call me old fashioned....lol. I give respect when it is due, and demand the same from my friends - you'll know if you've crossed the line.

And heres the deal breaker: If you don't do it for me mentally, you will NOT do it for me physically, I don't care how good you look, so you better have something intelligent/entertaining to say. If you are stupid or boring, move on. If you're not sure if you are boring or stupid, you probably are.

So I guess now I ought to tell you a little about me and the type of person I am looking for.

I am a nut! I have a very messed up sense of humor. I find a lot of things entertaining that the average girl probably wouldn't: I love the movie A Clockwork Orange, I enjoy raunchy jokes, and I cuss quite a bit. I can also be very feminine, but in a boot wearing, jeans and skull t-shirt kind of way.

What makes me unique? Hell, talk to me for five minutes and you'll figure it out. Whether or not you appreciate that uniqueness depends largely on whether you have a sense of humor or are a total lame-ass. I am kind of a smartass sometimes - okay, a lot of the time, but it's all in good fun and I usually don't mean anything by it. Unless you're a****

I love old rock, new rock, classic rock, alt. rock. You name it - if its rock, I probably like it. If I havent heard of it (slim chance), I'd love to give it a shot. Nine Inch Nails is my fave ever, followed by David Bowie, STP, AIC, Anything with Chris Cornell, Aveneged Sevenfold, Cold, Killswitch Engage, Incubus, 30 Seconds to Mars, Pantera, Black Sabbath, The Stones, The Beatles, ELO, Skynard, Zeppelin, Bob Marley, Jimi Hendrix, Sublime, 311, Fugazi, Deftones..the list goes on. I also love weird sh*tlike My Life With the Thrill Kill Kult, The Revolting****, Killer ****, Juliette and the Licks, Combichrist, The Birthday Massacre, Mindless Self Indulgence, Prince, Run DMC and The Beasties.

I would meet you somewhere neutral, you know, just in case you're a psycho killer (or in case I am - you never know)...like maybe a bar or a coffee shop or river street. We would walk/talk...sit/talk...drink/talk and then sing some kareoke (yes, you would because I would and I have an infectious personality that makes people do things they wouldn't normally do). If there's music, I might get you to dance. You will tell me some funny shit, I will laugh my ass off and give people dirty looks if they stare at me because I laughed so hard. I will tell you some funny shit, you will spew beer/coffee out of your nose. I will laugh harder and offer you a napkin. We may or may not go burn one...if you don't dig that, I can deal. More for me. We will eventually part ways; you may or may not get a kiss or other token of budding affection. We will go home(you to yours and me to mine)and you will wonder why you can't seem to get me out of your mind....and hopefully I will wonder the same about you.

The next time we get together, we will be more relaxed and will have much more fun (is that even possible? YES, it IS!).