UPDATE: The 'Lacy Underthings', 'Short Skirts' and 'High Heels' items in my 'Interests' section are for you to wear, not me! While I can be a very nasty little boy with the right partner & chemistry, I'm not into cross-dressing!

I'm a VERY young 52, no kids, married once. Was a pilot for over 20 years, then high-tech & dot.coms. Lost everything a couple of years ago and rebuilding as comedian & actor. Just following the path laid out for me and having fun with it! (Although it would be nice if there were signs so we knew when the turns were coming up: some of them will give you whiplash!!!)

I am VERY romantic. Not a hopeless romantic, a hopefull romantic! (Fave movie: Love Actually. And yes... I cry every time I watch it!) In about 40 years, I want to be one of those old couples you see who still look at each other with sparks in their eyes like they just met, always holding hands, touching, hugging and sharing with young couples how we met on the Internet. (Then we can explain to those young whippersnappers what the Internet was!) When I get the door for you, it’s not a ‘courtship’ thing; it’s what I’ll do for you as long as you'll have me. Also, I’m one of those guys who’s good with malling and has a pretty sharp fashion sense, although you would never know it by how I dress! (But that’s a whole other (explainable) issue we can discuss!) I’m good (and fearless) in the kitchen, too. Now if only I could remember to put the seat down ALL the time!!!

I’m looking for a long-term relationship with someone who wants a partner: in crime, in love, in bed, in every way possible. I’m a lot of fun: VERY active, love to dance (hip-hop, techno, swing, mix) and enjoy good live music. More of a Jazz, R&B, Dance than a rock guy. Can't deal with country, although I appreciate the talent. Sociable? Heck, I get up in front of crowds just to make them laugh! (And I do it well!) But do I have to be the life of the party? No. As a Taurus who’s held command positions since I was 18, some may think that I’m a dominating control freak who’s impossible to live with. Quite the opposite! I’m looking for someone who will stand NEXT to me. Someone who will enjoy leading sometimes and being led sometimes, but mostly walk through life together, in sync due to constant, consistant, open communication. (Can you tell I'm a communicator?)

As far as what makes me unique: Contrary to what Tyler Durden says, I REALLY AM a unique snowflake! If any of the above doesn’t demonstrate this, then the best example is my comedy. You can see it at: www.WilliamPLewis.com. You can also follow me on Twitter. (follow williamplewis) If you like it, contact me. If you don't: well... Such is life and I wish you the best!

I'm rather particular, so if I don't respond, don't take it personally; it's just that there was no 'Zing!' and I need the 'Zing!'!!! I'm sure that you'll find it with someone else. When I finally do find the 'Zing!', that will be it. I'm a one-woman man and would rather be alone without Ms. Right than be with Ms. Right Now. Go figure: a guy saying that! I'm looking forward to the day that I delete this account. I’ve yet to see anyone here who should be licensed and trained not to bark and there are so many possibilities here that everyone should be happy.

Now... I'm a very positive guy, always looking forward and believing that I live on the sunny side of the street. But, after reading a large number of profiles, let me take a page from you ladies, who seem to have no problem letting us guys know what we can't be, and state what doesn't work with me. This is all the hardass you’ll get from me, so let me get it out now and then it’ll be over and you won’t have to hear it again: (Most of this comes from experiences that I don’t wish to repeat, but don’t regret, either. Told you I’m a positive guy!)

I have absolutely NO TOLERANCE for drugs (including 4:20) or dependent drinking. I’ve never done anything harder than Vodka and I believe that alcohol is to be used as an enhancement to an event, not as the centerpiece of an event. My idea of 'end of evening fun' doesn't include holding your hair back while you toss the 4 shots of Jaeger you had when they made ‘last call’. Although... I am a tolerant and romantic guy and would do so if necessary. After all, we ALL know that sometimes, Ca-Ca Occurs!

I have no tolerance for liars, either. Lying includes 'I put down that I'm 40 even though I'm really a young 48'. If that's you, then I'm really George Clooney using a cover name here and our first date will be me sending my Gulfstream to pick you up so you can join me in Monte Carlo. Head to the nearest airport, now!

Lying also includes implants. If you were at one time THAT unhappy with yourself that you put yourself through THAT drama, then there's MORE drama in store for YOUR life and I'm not going to be a part of THAT. I'm just as God intended me to be (and happy with that, since it was His decision and I'm certainly not going to question Him!) and you should be too!

Tattoos and piercings other than ears are a turn off to me. I'm impressed with some of the work I've seen, but, quite simply: they're not my thing.

Also, ladies, please note that I've produced an articulate essay here. Spelling and grammar are correct. Please try to do the same. 'I like all music accept country' just makes me wonder how good those communication skills you consider so important really are.

WOW! That felt good! Now I know why your profiles always have so much ‘Don’t!’ stuff! I’m going to have to come up with more sometime! (Nah… That was enough!)

I'll get off my soapbox here and let you decide if you want to pursue. If you do, I promise: you're in for a treat!

First date: Let's meet at Rudy's Foothill Ranch and see if the convo/chem works. Friday nites are good if you like to dance. If the hip-hop/techno/dance scene (most of the kids there are under 30, but I fit in just fine) is too much, we'll head down to Brio for some swing.

Orrrrr... I'm 10 minutes (25 with tourist traffic) from Main Beach, Laguna. We could do that 'Walk On The Beach' that all of you write about.

From there... The universe will decide. Maybe friends. Hopefully more.