Choose your life's mate carefully. From this one decision will come ninety percent of all your happiness or misery. That came from "Life's Little Instruction Book", it's about the only sensible thing I could find in there. Some naive moron gave it to me as a gift years ago. I just got it out because most the profiles I've read reminded me of something, sure enough it's like they came straight out of the book.

I tore myself away from the safe comfort of certainties through my love for truth — and truth rewarded me.
~ Simone de Beauvoir

NOTE: If discomfort is your comfort zone then please move on. I'm looking for order in my life not chaos.

A LITTLE ABOUT ME
I never know what I'm looking for until I find it. Sounds like a cliche I know, but it's the truth. You never know when you're going to get that feeling!

I'm not looking for my soul-mate so I hope to hell she's looking for me. It's not by choice that I'm not looking, it's due to ignorance on my part. I don't have a clue where to start looking. I'm not just geographically lost (although I am), but I'm at a loss in every way. My theory of "you'll know it when you find it" has an inherent flaw; that is, that it's pretty hard to find something when you don't know what you're looking for. I know "there has to be a physical attraction, blah, blah, blah", goes without saying. Still I will not give in to the "grocery list" technique. This too isn't just me being stubborn, I wouldn't know what to put on the list. I've went into some relationship where she had some "qualities" which I thought there's no way I can handle this. However those "qualities" never seemed to be an issue (i.e. they were easy to block out). I've also went into relationships where our relationship didn't seem to have a flaw. Needless to say things didn't work out.
So it's up to you. You have to have better instincts in this area than I do (they can't be any worse).
And like I said before: you never know!

Note there's a number of profiles that I've read on this site where, (as you'll see below), the woman is looking for a partner that they don't need. I just want it to be known that I do not subscribe to this. I have lots of friends who I don't need, I want. To me the only difference between a partner and the rest of your friends should not be that you sleep with your partner. I can come to no other conclusion, that these women are saying the emotional attachment stops at the point where one or both parties starts to feel that the other is becoming a part of them. Is there something preventing them from wanting to open their heart? I don't understand.

I've been through so much crap (all my fault) that my heart should be cemented over by now. Somehow I forced myself to maintain my "innocence" (maybe not the best word), to keep an open heart. This has currently made me an apprehensive fool at times, but I still have an open heart. I search for the relationship where: we need each other; we complete each other; it feels like a void has been filled in my heart; I depend on her and she depends on me; when we hold each other, we know everything is all right; there's complete and total trust; and every time we say good bye, I just can't wait until the next time we meet.

SOME THINGS I DON'T LIKE:
If your profile frightens me in any way that's not a good thing. If half way through your About Me section I get the unmistakable impression that I'm getting b*tched at, then chances are, as I mumble a few choice insults under my breathe, I'm moving on. I know a lot of people like to think of themselves as independent, aggressive and strong but some people it seems really like to push these points. If you seem very determined to make the point: "I don't need someone I want someone", then I start to think that: you've either had one to many therapy sessions; or have a bookcase at home filled with badly written self-help books on co-dependency.
Furthermore, some people go to great lengths to express how busy and full their life is, although they have a few hours a week to themselves that they would like to share with that special someone. I can't speak for everyone out there but I think what they need to do is go to their local SPCA and pick out a dog for themselves (if they have the time).

Have you ever seen a profile with an 'About Me' section that starts off "My friends say I'm funny, honest, dependable, ...", well who cares what your friends say (imaginary or not)? What about your enemies? Let's get both sides of the story!

The Interest Section
I rarely get much out of the "Interest" section of a profile, it seems most people simply list things they like that 98% of the population like anyway. Then there are some interests for which I have my doubts, for example:
cyclist: just because every spring you wipe down your $1000 bike and take it for it's annual trip to the corner store does not make you a cyclist.
jogging: running from the car to the entrance way of a McDonald's, does not make you a marathon runner.
movies: yeah, I could believe that.
nature: opening the windows, on one of the five days of the year that you don't have either the furnace nor the air conditioner on, doesn't make you one with mother earth.
travelling: That school trip you took to Ottawa in grade 10, and the two all-inclusive trips you took to the Islands doesn't qualify you to claim that you like or dislike travelling.
specific foods: If your relationship is based on diet ... well ... good luck with that!
This section is for interests not likes, I agree there's not much of a difference in most cases but for example it's quite understandable to like bonfires but it seems a bit funny to have an interest in bonfires. As if it's something you'd like to write a book about "The Essence of the Bonfire"? How does that sound?

SOME OBSERVATIONS:
Let me just say that this site has the most self-proclaimed: well-adjusted, honest, outgoing, active, adventurous, easygoing, down to earth, open, independent, intelligent, compassionate, moral, fit, funny (but fail to share it) people as any one group I have ever met.

Let's say people are dedicated to staying fit. Do you really think as many people would be interested in fitness as there are if they weren't single? You know say a year into the relationship? I've seen it happen. The biggest competitor of a gym is a good relationship. It's my theory that the gym has professional interlopers on their payroll for the sole purpose of destroying good relationships. Watch out!!

Go for a coffee; or a walk; or do anything where we could talk, get to know each other better and see each other in a well lit area .i.e. No loud bars, loud clubs, dark alleys or abandoned warehouses (you only make that mistake once, well OK twice).
Failing all else maybe a sleazy motel room!! (What? It can be a good ice breaker.)

In order to obtain that first date I advise you to read POF for Dummies.
Topics include:
(1) How to attract men using plagiarism.
(2) How to attract men using only ellipses for punctuation ... and I love to laugh.
--- See (3)
(3) How to attract men using your cleavage.
(4) How to attract men not using your cleavage.
--- See (3)
(5) How to appear smart when you're not.
--- See (1) & (3)
(6) How to list as many consecutive adjectives as possible.
(7) How to use psycho babble to your advantage (warning this only works on the uneducated and the intoxicated).
(8) How to convince people that your kids mean everything to you, when, well, they really don't.
(9) How to live with yourself when you look at your 'you as a favourite' list.
---- See (14)
(10) How to come across as strong, when you're one drink away from slitting your wrists.
---- See (1) then (14)
(11) How to express that you're a b*tch without actually uttering an illegal threat.
---- See (1)
(12) How to come across as nonchalant when you haven't had sex in two years.
---- Note: this section has been omitted since it came to our attention that there is no way. Please See (13)
(13) How to shamelessly put yourself out there leaving no doubt that you aim to get laid, and quick! (just wavering on 'looking for Intimate Encounter')
(14) Getting professional help