HOBBIES
-Playing keyboards, drums, guitar, bass and 'sexophone'.
-Lifting incredible amounts of weight.
-Making jokes about genitalia.
-Cooking lavish meals and serving them on naked Japanese girls.
-Self improvement.
-Imitating Bukowski.
-Snowboarding at cripplingly fast speeds down extremely steep hills.
-Being a rock star.
-Being a recluse.

GOALS
-To not contract an STD from someone who I've met on this site.
-To learn as much as I can in the field of robotics and automation.
-I want to travel the world like a gypsy.
-To make a lot of noise until the day I die!
-To make a beautiful corpse.

WHAT MAKES ME UNIQUE
-I know more random facts than anyone you know.
-I can write you your own song upon first meeting you.
-I am very active and keep a pretty hellish pace. I have no plan to stop!
-I can teach you to snowboard through the motivational power of fear and humiliation.
-It takes a lot to make me angry and very little to make me happy.
-I don't care about money. I don't need a lot, just enough.
-I've spent most of my life on a beach.
-Most of my friends are female. I can deal with your shit.
-I get very excited about stupid little things.
-I have tattoos, but nowadays that doesn't really make you unique.
-If I like you I will do whatever I can to make you happy.

TASTE IN MUSIC
-Grindcore
-Late 80's/Early 90's Death Metal
-Cuban Salsa
-Lame Catchy 80's Pop (LEVEL 42!!!!!)
-Outlaw Country
-Whatever music my friends and I happen to be making

WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR
-To meet new, wonderful and beautiful human beings.
-A partner in crime.
-Women who are actually here to chat and meet people instead of those who just like the ego boost of seeing that they have mail.
-Someone who can spell properly and knows where the periods and commas go in a sentence.
-A woman who actually knows what "average" is. Don't lie, be yourself!
-I am not looking for sex. Ok I lied, I'm looking for sex...eventually. I'd prefer it to be with someone I have some connection with and vice versa.
-I'd like a woman with "balls" (not literally).
-Bonus points if you have wild curly hair!

**If you don't feel like writing anything about yourself in your profile don't bother messaging me. Trying to get by with that one picture you looked good in 5 years ago isn't going to work for me either. Be yourself...big, small, fat, tall or ugly...whatever!**

PS. By popular demand I'm working on the ultimate douchebag photo, topless in front of a civic...coming soon!

For our first date I would take you cow tipping with my oafish jock friend Ram. We would try to date rape you while we were drunk. Then your dangerously mysterious boyfriend (played by a young Christian Slater)would shoot Ram and I and make it look like we were secret homosexual lovers...Oh wait, that was from the movie The Heathers...d*mn.

Seriously though, I'd have to go with something fun and interesting where we're both completely out of our element. That way neither one of us has a distinct advantage.