Just moved to San Francisco for school. The city is exciting.
===================================================================================
A lot of stuff is going on. Leaving PoF for a while. Bye.
===================================================================================
Read this section. If it doesn't make you smile at least once, I'll treat you to dinner.
===================================================================================

I'm here to find you . Like E.T. , when he makes that contraption to signal his weird alien people . Its like that except
with odd words and a total lack of proper paragraphs . If you dont know who E.T. is he was basically a brown , outer
space raisin that gets lost and befriends a boy .

I have a car . I have teeth . I have hair . Actually , new hair ! The day before yesterday I cut my ear because there's
this one stupid hair that's growing out of my ear ! I think it's messing with my equilibrium or sloshing my coaxial fluid
( or cochlear fluid ? ) around so I tried to shave it and it cut everything BUT the hair . Thats one of the main reasons
I'm here .

It bled alot for an ear cut . ( ? ) And I thought , what if I died here , right now . Laying on the floor , ear blood
caked around me for weeks ! I'd not be found for months later and then I'd be bloated and walrusy and some rookie
paramedic would throw up and yell

" I didnt sign up for this ! " and then storm out before he's stopped by an elder and more grizzled paramedic who says

" We all have our walrus days . "

Then they hug and roll my bloated carcass down the stairs .

I dont want to be a bloated carcass rolled down the stairs .

I want my girlfriend or wife to find me while I'm still concsious and say ' Oh , baby ! Was it that one ear hair ? '

And I'll gasp ' Yes.......it t'was.... '

And she'll say ' You know , t'was , includes 'it' , so you didnt have to say 'it' , just 't'was '

Then I'd say ' I hate it ....when you do ....~ gasp ~....that . '

Then I'd be saved ! Saved and slightly annoyed but saved !

But , I'm here for more then self preservation . I really am looking for a girl to spend some time with , get to know ,
then eventually , take that big step . That step that naturally bumps up the relationship to a new level . Emeril would
say ' Kick it up a notch . '

Abe Lincoln would say '.............' because he's incapable of speech . He's dead .

But you ladies know what I mean .

Seeing the new Star Trek movie in IMAX .

Yeah . Its a big step . Normal theater screens are for the first few dates . IMAX......IMAX is when you're serious
about the girl you're seeing . Actually , this is just a side note , if I were the owner of an IMAX theater I would sell
everything smaller . Like , the popcorn and soda to make the screen seem even bigger . But thats neither here nor there .

I do really believe in fate though . Destiny . My ( obviously great sense of ) humour aside , I believe that theres one
person out there for each of us . That one in a trillion shot at true , unshakeable love . So , I'm here giving it a shot .

Is she you ? Will I find you ? Will we meet and fall instantly in love ?!? Will we meet and want to immediately destroy
the other ? Ive never met anyone and instantly wanted to be their arch enemy . But theres a first time for everything .
Actually , no , there isnt . I highly doubt there will ever be a first time for a giant , diabetic , Lucky Charms
marshmellow monster that runs amok and destroys Greenlands economy .

But , if you've read this far and you're intrigued then write me .

If I'm NOT your type but you feel compelled to write me anyways with words of encouragement then please send a pic of your
boobs .

Boobs are the most encouraging thing of all .

In all seriousness , I'm ready to meet someone . I want to have long discussions about nothing and lay on the hood of my
car and look up at the stars and point and discuss the depressing fact that most of them have long since been destroyed
and we're kind of looking back in time . I want to talk on the phone at 3 a.m and groggily say things and not remember
any of it just hours later .

There are so many things that are just better with that special someone .

Just write me back . I'll message you and answer any questions to satisfy your morbid curiosity . You can add me and
keep track of my epic adventure to find a mate . I'll keep a log , unless I find her right away in which case I'll be too
busy ravaging her with unbridled lust to properly update my progress .

Unbridled lust or a Scrubs marathon . Either or may disrupt regular log updates .

Oh ! Wait . Who I'm looking for !

Just the girl of my dreams . I dont really care about age but try and be in your twenties . If you're older , I guess thats
ok . I don't want to discriminate based on age and who knows the girl I'm meant for may be older , but seriously .....
under thirty .

Thanks for reading the whole thing and good luck !

For the record, it is really hard to write a response to ':)' or ':D'.

I'm kind of tired I think I'll finish this later. You're probably sick of reading by now