i'm pretty intense; a lot of people bother me... what i'm looking for in a guy is someone who is a lot like me... funny, smart, likes to work out, enjoys sports (basketball, soccer, baseball, wakeboarding, snowboarding, football etc.), aspire to be successful, likes to travel, floats the river, likes nice cars, likes to cuss, likes to drink and dive-bar hop, loves their family, a Blazer fan, enjoys spending money, likes animals, spicy food, and doesn't like online dating.

Must be at least 6' tall, 25-33 years old. Good hygiene is a must (straight teeth, short fingernails, etc.)

and OH my effin god... do NOT message me if you have a shitty-ous picture of yourself in the bathroom mirror... TAKEN by your shittyself.

and don't message me if you have sideways pictures; if you don't know how to "rotate" you are retarded.

UPDATE on the bathroom pics:::: holy shiit- these pictures seriously make me want to throw up. do yourself a favor and DELETE these bathroom pictures, NOW. i just saw one that takes the cake- dude taking the photo (shirtless, duh) in the mirror, and the toilet in the background still had piss in it. you KNOW WHO YOU ARE, now go update your profile to Male seeking Male, because only another fuuckin dude can appreciate this nasty photo. girls don’t dig it.

to a Blazer game, baseball game, or happy hour.

you know, fuuck it... let's not call it a first date, let's call it a viewing. chances are, i'm gonna know in like, T minus two seconds whether i'm going to want to spend more than two minutes in your company.... then we'll go from there :)

don’t take offense when I choose the table closest to the door. can’t be too prepared for a quick exit.