I'm now accepting applications for a 'Girlfriend' position in my life.

Interested women must have their experience and qualifications backed by appropriate references.

Now I know you're probably dying to hear all about my hobbies and interests, as well as the ridiculously high goals and aspirations I've set for myself, but if I'd put everything down here it'd take away all the fun and mystery, wouldn't it? For now, I'll give you a tiny little glimpse into my world.

Basically, I live my life keeping in mind I have to make it exciting for those who'll one day read my biography. That means I'm into skydiving, bungee jumping, Carribean getaways, weekend trips to Vegas, and driving my Lamborghini around the city, picking up exotic supermodels. OK, I'll admit I'm getting a little carried away here, I've never been bungee jumping.

What else? Well, I'm big into sports. I've been a huge Red Wings fan since I was about 7. I'm addicted to newspapers and what's in them, news. I'm not a big movie guy, most of them put me to sleep. I'd rather read a good book, where the subtleties and intricacies of the story are much more rewarding and worth my time. Oh, and I was about to forget. I listen to better music than you.

Perhaps I should warn you ladies right away: you're not going to bed early with me. I'm a night person. I'll listen to music, watch Conan and Letterman, read, write, lick french vanilla ice cream off your sweet sweet ass, or just roam around the city. But I am not going to bed early. If you had a really long day, maybe I'll give you a break.

Sadly, I'm not about to spill the beans and tell you exactly what types of women intrigue me. I wouldn't want you to be something you're not just to impress me, you know?

"Should I really write this guy? I mean, he seems fascinating and he's pretty cute, but what if he's some sort of freak?". Stop thinking, love. You'll never get what you want out of life if you don't put yourself out there and take risks. Life's a gamble. And I know you can't wait to get your chips on the table.

I'll write something exciting that'll make you wanna drop your panties in a quick second, but for now just look at my picture, agree that I'm good looking and let's hook up. :)