| | Friendly, caring, considerate, fit, affectionate, and not too bad to look at..(in the dark, after a few drinks.. ;-)) A bit sarcastic at times, which I probably shouldn't..
Ideal lady.. loving, caring, loyal, affectionate, cuddly and busty, likes a cuddle... and not too bad to look at (in the dark,after a few drinks..)
Likes... walks/bike rides in the country, channel 4, ac/dc, tea, nights out, roller coasters, chinese food, squirrels..
Dislikes... narcissism (plenty of that around here), smoking, describing yourself as 'bubbly' (or 'sassy' for that matter), eastenders, 'celebrity' anything, cars with no roof, rich good looking successful blokes (b*stards!), dog owners, bunny boilers..
OK OK calm down, the dog owners bit means those idiots who let their dogs run riot all over the place and don't pick up their mess. If you have a dog and its well trained, kept under control and you pick up its poo so we dont all have to suffer, then I applaud and respect you.
Actually I'm quite taken aback by some of the bitter, man-hating profiles on here. OK so we've all probably been mistreated by someone in the past but really.. lighten up girls..
Thanks for dropping by, and have a great day.
PS. And please, will all you married and attached ladies please stop pestering me for sex, I'm flattered but the answer is no!
.. although the dirty photos are ok..
And finally... if you're still here, a gag..
One day, after a near eternity in the Garden of Eden, Adam calls out,
"Lord, I have a problem."
"What's the problem, Adam?", The Lord replies.
"Lord, I know you created me and have provided for me and surrounded
me with this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, but I'm
just not happy."
"Why is that, Adam?", comes the reply from the heavens.
"Lord, I know you created this place for me, with all this lovely food and
all of the beautiful animals, but I am lonely."
"Well Adam, in that case I have the perfect solution. I shall create a
'woman' for you."
"What's a 'woman', Lord?"
"This 'woman' will be the most intelligent, sensitive, caring, and
beautiful creature I have ever created. She will be so intelligent
that she can figure out what you want before you want it. She will
be so sensitive and caring that she will know your every mood and
how to make you happy. Her beauty will rival that of the heavens and
earth. She will unquestioningly care for your every need and desire.
She will be the perfect companion for you.", replies the heavenly
voice.
"Sounds great."
"She will be, but this is going to cost you, Adam."
"How much will this 'woman' cost me Lord?", Adam replies.
"She'll cost you a leg, an arm, an eye, an ear, and a testicle."
"Adam ponders this for some time, with a look of deep thought and
concern on his face.
Finally Adam asks the Lord, "Uh, what can I get for a rib?"
Its the way I tell 'em.. |
