My Dating Rules

1. No making out on the first date. OK, maybe a little, but only for a few minutes. Things shouldn’t get too crazy on a first date. Which brings me to…
2. No one night stands or any other action below the belt. C’mon girls, I’m giving you the chance to be the one…Ms. Right and a bag of chips. We can’t begin a romantic relationship with each other when after three hours we could indenify each other’s junk in a lineup.
3. Do not send me naked pictures of yourself. I know it seems like a good idea at the time, but keep your panties on.
4. Let’s drink! On a first date we do just drinks. I’ll pay, but no dinner. Not that I’m cheap (we can do dinner on the second date), but drinking on a first date helps you relax and makes you more fun, as well as gives me an easier out than a long dinner, (although I never take the out anyway).
5. I will not fulfill a boyfriend role, so if you are on a mission to snatch a hubby before you’re thirty and don’t care who it is, stop reading.
6. Live close to me! For crying out loud, long distances are a pain in the a**.
7. Let’s not talk about if we’re still dating other people until at least the fourth date. That will solve a lot of issues early on if neither of us bring it up.
8. I’m not giving you my last name before or after the first date and I won’t ask for yours either. No offense, but I don’t know you and there’s no reason you need to know my epic personal accomplishments. I have Google too.
9. If we start dating and it’s early on in the relationship…no unannounced stop-bys, just don’t show up without getting in touch first…and no constant calls and/or texts…and don’t fall in love…we barely know each other.



P.S. - 10. Please don't take this list too seriously ;)

I guarantee an orgasm or dinner is on me.