Harley ridin, Scuba divin, Jeep drivin, Movie goin, Pizza eatin, Guitar playin, Beer drinkin, Picture takin, kinda guy.
Ready to start the next chapter in my life.
Think of me as your "White Trash Knight In Rusty Armor"
Here comes the "what are you looking for in a date/partner/lover/accountant, thing.
I will get right to the point, short, skinny, large up top, (E cup) round below, lots of money, who just wants to spend it on me, and in return I promise to shower daily.
You know, real classy lady (former stripper/porn star)
OK now back to reality.
After the passing of my wife, I realize I am a better person when I have someone to share my day with.
By phone, over the internet, smoke signals, high speed teletype, what ever.
Lets start with that and see what happens.
I am not looking for a one night stand.
Friendship first.
So when you are ready to lower your standards, let me know.
Some things about me.
I am very shy.
I am very quiet in public, im an observer.
I won't contact you first.
as long as you keep typing at me, i will try my best to return your messages, i don't want to be thought of as a stalker.
I have just been asked if i like a hourglass figure.
The answer is yes.
But it all depends where most of the sand is (see above)
I don't do the wine thing, the Starbucks thing, or the dance thing.
Although i don't mind watching you dance (stripper pole?)
Please be relatively close to me if you wish to have some sort of relationship. (across the street)
Please come back from time to time to view my updated profile

I know this would be a terrible first date (according to some) but here goes.
pizza and a movie, or if you prefer, movie and a pizza
see im flexible.
Some people say, at a movie, it does not give you a chance to talk,
That is true, but it does give you a chance to observe, to see what you laugh at, to see what you cry at, to see what you eat when its dark.
And ladies, please please please, stop with the camera phone pictures.
After reading many of the profiles, I think I have finally deciphered the wording used by the members.
Let me know if this is close.
"Love to travel" translation, If you want to get anywhere with me, it's gonna cost you
"Love to dine out" translation, If you want to get anywhere with me, it's gonna cost you.
"I have high morals" translation, I don't sleep around. (unless your rich)
"Looking for a partner in crime" translation, Im a shoplifter.
"I'm down to earth" translation" I'm a space alien hiding out on planet earth.
"looking for a generous man" translation, I'm a slut. (not that slut is a bad thing)
"I am worth it" translation, I'm a slut. (see above)
"Looking for friendship" translation, I'm not interested in you unless you are very rich.
"loves to go to the (fill in the blank) translation, you are going to pay for everything.
"looking for a successful man" translation, you must be rich
"I am the girl next door type" translation, I still live with my mother and father.
"Love the outdoors" translation, I'm homeless and live in a cardboard box.
"Must love cats" translation, I have 100 cats
"Self Employed" translation, unemployed
"Entrepreneur" translation, unemployed
more to come