Apparently no one liked my party picture (except me), so there's one showing me in the monkey suit.

I'm thinking that the type of profile that women (of my approximate age) would like to see would go sort of like this: "Hi, I'm ______. I'm completely divorced/over my ex, and am looking for a quality LTR. I love to ride my bike, pretty much do anything outdoors. I'm financially stable and looking for a partner to enjoy all that life has to offer with."

Yeah, that's the fantasy. Meaning, hardly any guys would write that, and the few that would are lying. It's the equivalent of the male fantasy where a woman would write a totally sexual profile. I'm sure 99%+ of all women would find something like that laughable. The question is, can you see the other side (the male profile for females I just outlined above) as being equally ridiculous?

What's reality? Reality is sitting across the table from someone. It takes time, effort, and frankly, low expectations since a lot of the time things won't work out. Profiles, IMs and phone calls are of minor use and do little to affect the face to face encounter one way or another. That's why my profile is so brief:

Yuppie-type with typical interests along those lines. Virtually impossible to find in NW IN; IL please respond. No NASCAR, trailers, stalkers or financial problems. A photo is not neccesary up front, but it will be shortly thereafter if we chat at all. No physical attraction = no relationship. Caucasians only.

Addendum: The most common thing women's profiles say is "No drama" and/or "No games". What this means is no drama or games that negatively affect them. Of course we all want positive drama and games, life would be unbearably boring without them. But since no one can read the future, we can't tell how things are going to play out. So what does this mean. It means, quite simply, "You pays you money and you takes you chances".