I saw a couple in the store the other day and as they were waiting in line to pay for the plants they’d chosen, she hugged him and just stood there, holding onto him with her head on his shoulder, and he responded in kind. It was a touching moment they were willing to let the world share and mostly it just made me smile to remember times I have had that in my life, too. I know how good that feels. The “he’s my man” feeling is a great one to have. And of course, before you get that far, there is that excitement you get when you’re with someone new who you really think you could fall in love with. That “can’t get him outa your head, smiling until your cheeks hurt” kinda feeling; that blissful agony of having to wait until the next time you see him…mushy stuff, I know, but honestly, I think that’s a good thing to never grow out of.

I’m not sad or depressed because I don’t have that right now. I have a great life in so many ways, with a family (I’m a divorced mom), many good friends, and a job and other aspects of my life that bring a lot of satisfaction and happiness. I don’t need a man in my life to make me happy. But, all things being equal, I’d like one. I’ve been trying on and off with varied results. Of course, I know that things need to start at the beginning, and I’m not particularly in a rush. I’ve had a lot of great fun so far, whether it turned into something long-term or not.

It’s hard to decide which is more of a turn-on: a really good brain or a really sexy body. Actually, I know the answer. Altho the sexy body is great, it doesn’t last forever…that having been said, I do want to be with someone I consider handsome. Passion and physical intimacy are very important to me, so I want to be attracted to the person I am with. I’ve been attracted to lots of different types over the years, although it is true that I do have a preference for men of color and/or men not born in this country. If you speak Spanish, even better.

I don’t think I have that long laundry list a lot of men say women seem to have, but there is a list (everyone has one whether or not they admit it). I think mine just tends to be different than other women’s. There are a few basics of course: non-smoker, not married, between the ages of 35 and 55, and living in the immediate bay area (east bay is ideal). There are several things I don’t care too much about at all: don’t care what line of work you’re in; don’t care what kind of car you drive; don’t need you to be 6” tall (that’s so silly); don’t even really care whether or not you own a house, but financially stable is good.

I am most attracted to and get along best with men who have most (if not all) of these traits: smart; self-confident; good communicator; handsome; dark features, especially brown skin and/or being born in another country; a parent; very sexual and sensual; thoughtful and introspective; honest and direct; social; open-minded and liberal; kind; passionate; romantic.

In terms of me, well, I am almost all of those things mentioned above – although I am not brown skinned (but I do have dark features), and I was born in NY. I am a very attractive, very young looking, 45 year old mom of two teens. I’m in good shape and love being outdoors. I enjoy cooking, gardening, reading, writing, hiking, running, exploring new places, live music, and of course the standard “dinners out, movies in, cuddling on the couch” stuff that everyone likes. A couple things that you might not expect: I shoot with a bow and arrow, love action movies (especially kung fu), and really like it when a man opens doors for me and walks on the outside of the sidewalk.