Kind, happy, athletic, polite, employed, clean, intelligent, positive, fun, honest, fit, mesomorphic, and moderately humorous. I'm very organized and disciplined. I’m quite punctual, eat with my elbows off the table and chew with my mouth closed. I love my mom and try not to swear too much. I hold open doors, push in chairs and leave the seat down when there's a lady in the house.

A learning existentialist.

I’m not quite what you’d call a “metro sexual” but I do like to take care of myself. In that, I mean I get my hair cut regularly, use products, tan, and exfoliate as part of my nightly routine. I have been known to have my toe nails painted on occasion. Only masculine colours though. Anything else would be REALLY gay. Call that whatever you want. I put the "man" in "manicure".

I like to laugh. It's how I do abs. Lots of things tickle my funny bone and my sense of humour is a little…let’s say “diverse”. If shows like Ali G, Borat, Bruno, South Park, King of the Hill, Johnny Bravo, Family Guy, Jackass, Reno 911, Arrested Development, Duckman, Robot Chicken, Kevin Spencer, The Office, the Geico Caveman,or Trailer Park Boys make you giggle, you know where I’m coming from. Wait until you read some of my creative writing.

On the grand spectrum of things, with HIPPIE being the far left and RED NECK being the far right, I would have to say that I’m just left of centre. I really dig the ideas of “peace and love” and liberal hemp use; I’m just really opposed to excessive body hair, unemployment and not bathing.

Some things I am fond of:

Savary Island pie (okay, pie in general), red meat, coffee, Raunch parties, Sunny-D and Absolut, dress-up, fashion shows, the thespian attempts of William Shatner, gardening, pigs, (the swines, not the police) cartoons, house music, sex appeal, David Graux, Nagel, Vargas, roller blading, lacrosse, working out, Fetish Night, fishing, Hallowe'en, just about anything on a beach, back gammon, Scrabble, women’s shoes, (on her, not me) cooking, UFC, K-1, writing, photography, punctuality, tropical fishes, ancient history, women's tennis, manners, bbq, respect, loyalty, integrity, cow bell, Red Lobster, paintball, panda attacks, bacon, orchids, side boob, David Caruso one liners, pineapple, "that's what she said", and drive.

Some things I’m not particularly fond of:

Hippies and hippie bullshit, ginger kids, yappy rat dogs, phones in theaters, N.A.M.B.L.A., screaming kids in restaurants, comb-overs, camel toe, line-ups, tampon commercials, spiders, cankles, obesity, gluttony, drunks, Smart Cars, Steven and Chris, clowns, religious zealots, rodeos, guys with I.L.S. (imaginary lat syndrome), boy bands, kidney stones, laziness, mimes, racism, front bum, internet lurkers, trophy hunting, spitting, drama, leave blowers and homophobia.


Okay, here’s where I get superficial and shallow.

What I’m looking for in a woman:

An open minded, healthy, happy, kind woman who is funny, honest and loyal. Good posture, confidence and punctuality go a long way with me too.

I have a very healthy sexual appetite. Without getting into it too much here, let’s just say that if you have to have the lights off or find sex on your knees degrading, it’s probably best that you just move along.

I train hard, watch what I eat and really try to take care of myself. You should too. I don’t consider “pride” a sin. I want everyone to sit down and learn the difference between thin, athletic, average, and a few extra pounds. Athletic would indicate that you do something "athletic" (imagine that??)and don't just fit into the general dimensions.

Alcoholics and druggies… move along. Nothing to see here. I like to have a good time too; I just don’t let the good time run my life.


Looking for something casual to start but would really like to get off this site. Soon.
Really soon.

You'd pick me up in a fancy car or limo, take me out for dinner somewhere nice. Then you'd take me to an uber hip nightspot where you'd grease our way through the VIP line and into our own private booth. You'd then take the liberty of having bottle service delivered to our table. (Belvedere please) After that it's anyone's guess.

Or...

We could meet somewhere public for a coffee or something, make sure we look like our profile pics and go from there?