I am a newly rehabbed woman way beyond the need to acquire any more fixer-upper male opportunities. If you like to yell, bully people with half-baked intelligence, or include Jesus in most of your sentiments, please flee my profile.

Warning: I have a personality. This means that I have a variety of interests and facial expressions, flights of fancy, grand gestures, and I will likely not fit any ideal mold of perfection that you have been carrying around with you since the age of five.

I don't play jealousy; it's never been a part of my repetoire and it never will be. I won't arm wrestle your mother for your affections, I will never flirt with your friends, and ask only that your dog/child/gal pals be willing to share.

In all seriousness, I've led an interesting life, been many places, have a lot of friends, am and have been very independent, cherish my crazy family, have a lot of stories to tell, am passionate about my career, adore animals, and am only missing someone who is fascinating, unique, cerebral, and open. I'd label myself very honest, courteous, comical, and active both physically and mentally. I also keep up to date on music and movies. My friends would say I'm loyal, protective, generous to a fault,and drily hilarious. I believe that I have a lot of remarkable things to bring to the table, so to speak, and am looking for a man who is like-minded.

Relax. I don't need you to "complete me," maybe just complete my sentences. I don't need you to reassure me; I know who I am. I don't need you to continually amuse me; try sitting back and being dazzled by someone else for a change. My daddy issues have all been addressed, thanks. Oh, and posting pictures of your dog does nothing but reaffirm my belief that dogs are very loyal creatures.

A few of my fave bands: The Black Keys (blues), Kings of Leon, Led Zeppelin, The Cure

A few of my fave movies: Psycho (huge Hitchcock fan), Good Will Hunting, Rocky, Ghostbusters, Let the Right One In

A few of my fave tv shows: MASH, 3rd Rock From the Sun, Frasier, Roseanne, Twilight Zone

General pet peeves: laziness/lack of drive, compulsive sniffing/snorting, interrupting/lack of manners, a blanket opinion of women, disregard for environment, superficiality, materialism/capitalism, narrow worldview, people who are married to their cell phoness/pc/xbox/ESPN (it's nice that you like sports; I don't, and that doesn't make either of us the better person.)

I'm having a hard time on this site finding men who can hold conversations. Please don't step up to bat and go silent. I am not a court jester or a stand-up comedian. Come armed and ready to discuss all of your splendors. Thanks

My favorite first dates include conversation, lots of laughing, a glass of wine or two, maybe a walk, and good food. Simple, unlike me. Tell me your stories.