It really isnt simple anymore. When was the last time you were asked out by someone? Could be a in public place like at work, or in a restuarant with friends, a book store, coffee shop or even the grocery store? I'm leaving the bar/club scene out becasue honestly is anyone looking for a relationship there?

Well enough about that. A little about myself. My name is Ben I'm 32 years old and live in Williamsburg VA. I have lived here for about 4 years give or take. I just moved back last year from VA beach. I was in the Military (Navy) as a 2nd class Gunnersmate and SAR (Search and Rescue) swimmer for 4 years. I have seen a lot in my life, before and when I was in the navy, more then most. I got out to join the Police dept. I like it, its a job but I dont think it is something I would want to do for the rest of my life. Before that I was in Richmond getting my degree in Art. I also lived in CO. where for 8 years I was on the US Ski team and ranked 5th in state (when I was a young lad)...

I have been on this site for a few months and it seems like the harder I try to get to know someone, the harder it is to try and stay in touch with them. It's great at first, the texts and the phone calls (before meeting) and then the hard part comes along, the actual meet and greet. I think it is a little frustrating and funny at the same time. You talk and talk on the phone and then meet and something happens. Some reason the attraction isnt there anymore or the phone calls seem to dwindle more and more. It just seems weird; we're the same people that talked on the phone, texted back and forth and something changes from the transition. Now of course I have heard the horror stories, the guy or girl doesnt look like their picture--and/or has a picture on here from 10 years ago. It's not simple anymore. I see profile after profile saying "I'm not looking for a hook up or booty call or games." Well of course your not, who does that (I'm sure there are some) Im not on here to intentionally hurt anyone and I dont want to get hurt either, no one does. I just find it funny to see the same phrase everytime. I guess it's like a product at a store, where ever you go, its the same price everywhere.

I was always taught how to treat a woman while dating her and or being with her in a long term relationship. My grandmother taught me pretty much everything I needed to know (laugh if you want-rest her soul) I remember an athlete on tv one time saying that chivalry was dead. Well i can tell you one thing right now, either he was dating guys or he dated girls and not a woman, chivalry is not dead, not by a mile. I love doing that kind of stuff though. Wheather its opening doors, letting her walk ahead, letting her order first, getting up at the table when she leaves, complimenting her--I love doing that stuff, I wish i could do it more to be honest. I guess some women never hear it enough or dont hear it at all, and when they do, they dont know what to think or do, so they get a little weirded out from time to time. When a woman tells a man a compliment, its always nice to hear. I just miss doing that for someone special.

INTRESTS/HOBBIES-Im an avid illustrator, and draw about 3 hours a day. I am also a movie buff as well as you can tell below. I try to get to the theatre every now and then...but it is hard with work and tickets are ridiculous now. I like work out when I have time, 4 times a week at least. I just took up boxing. I like to fish with my dad when my mom isnt working him to death in the back yard. I like to crab. I am a big movie buff, as you can see below. Im a fiend when it comes to asian dishes and sushi. I like to shop (Yeah, shop, I have to wear clothes too.) I like a beer now and again, but not a big drinker. I like to play a video game now and then (Just got a Wii) but not all day, something to kill time before heading out or doing something, and I just like trying new places to eat. I also like to write as well, as you can probably guess by now.

WHAT I AM NOT LOOKING FOR--pretty much the same as anyone else,,drama-princess's and queens..MARRIED WOMEN...stay away from me, its nothing but a bomb waiting to explode plus its to much work. If you dont love him anymore, tell the poor guy--get a back-bone and tell him, dont come on here. If he's cheating on you and your cheating on him, at least you can come to an agreement and say its not working lets just call it quits. Coming on here doesnt fix it, you still have to come home. Women with Boyfriends...WTF...why are you on here, let him make you happy or vice versa...dont rub it other peoples faces. In my opinon your just eye-candy on here and you like the attention, kinda sad actually, the only attention you need to be getting is from your boyfriend or signifigent other and vice versa. Not to come on here and say "Look at me--oh sorry not interested" That goes for women not looking/not single...why are you on here then and dont say your looking for friends, thats BS from the moment you typed it...who comes on here to look for friends? Honestly.

Apparently everyone is infatuated with pictures on this site. (obviously). My pictures are recent fore-most, I think two or three are from 1 to 2 years ago. Im not one to take pictures of myself every 12 hours (like most on here)...I look the same even after 13 hours...There is a thing that has been going on for billions of years...its called aging...I didnt make this happen, part of life. Comes back to saying I dont take pictures of myself everyday...The point, I havent met anyone who looks EXACTLY like their picture(s)...not a big deal. And to add. Just because Im not smiling in a couple of my pictures doesnt mean I'm depressed, misarable, grumpy, mad, frustrated or any other negative emotion...I just dont like to smile in pictures is all...Dont judge a book by its cover.

FIRST DATE:(Suspensful music playing) First dates are always the worst dates...Keep it simple with a coffee/beer and a good company and a good conversation go from there. Maybe some pool or bowling, that always seems to break the ice and get rid of some of the tention and awkwardness of the first date.

FAVORITE MOVIE QUOTES:--can you name the movie(s)?
-"The Devil's hands have been busy."
-"My god, do we really suck? Or is this guy really this good?"
-"You know what I think? It doesn't really matter what I think...once that first bullet goes past your head...all the politics and other sh-t go right out the window."
-"So you're thinkin, dont, because Sgt, you cant control who gets hit and who doesnt. Someone falling out of a chopper, or why. It aint up to you, its just war."
-"Yee-Haw!...Whats on your mind hill-billy?.."What was I thinking about?..... Oh yeah, Yee-Haw."
-"Rick, Where did you get a hand grenade?"..."I don't know."
-This is them 3 hours ago...2 hours ago...1...these are the guys who run the g-d damn olympics..they've been closing on us all night."
-"I know kung-fu"..."Show me."
-"What the f--k have you done lately?"
-"There's a flip side to that coin. What if you do have me boxed in and I got to put you down, cause no matter what you will not get in my way. We've been face to face, yeah. But I will not hesitate, not for a second"....."Maybe that'll be the way it will be...or who knows"..."Or maybe we'll never see each other again."
-"You have to be the DUMBEST, SMART person I have ever met."
-"People put you down long enough, you start to believe them."
-"When I go home, People ask me, Hey Hoot why do you do it man? Why? You some kind of war junkie?..And I dont say a god damn word, why? cause they wouldnt understand, they wouldnt understand its about the man next you...and that's all it is....HEY!...We started a new week."

WHAT I HAVE EXPERIENCED SINCE BEING ON THIS SITE AND ON DATE(S)

-Being on time must be over-rated these days (if you call and say your running late, thats fine.)
-Dont invite yourself over to my place. ( I dont know you that well yet.)
-Please be sober enough when I meet you for the first time. (I'd like you to at least remember the date, even if we dont go out again.)
-Leave work at work, dont bring it on the date.
-Texting/on the phone during lunch/dinner. (If you have kids thats fine.)
-Running up a tab (Yeah it happens.)
-Dont freak out if I want to meet in a public place.
-Saying thank you even if we dont go out again.
-Dont talk about your weight every 5 minutes. (You look fine.)
-Dont get all bent out of shape if someone says "Let go Dutch."
-Cant take a joke.
-Doesnt eat more then two bites at dinner/lunch and say they are not very hungry...(Why did we plan on lunch/Dinner?.)
-Bringing up someones income level (really? Give me a break.)
-Bringing friends on dates...what are we in, 6th grade?