Seriously, I need someone to help me knock over a kiosk in the mall. They sell dead-sea salt. The way I see it going down is we'll pose a couple (unless we fall in love before then, in which case we'll just be a couple - Bonnie and Clyde style!!) and they'll pull you in to show you something, and then have you scrub your hands. When this happens, I'll chloroform the co-worker, then come out guns blazing - tell the whole mall to get down on the floor - maybe fire a couple times in the air for effect. Then you'll load up the stroller we were pushing full of the stuff and we'll sell it on ebay at a steep discount but still a good price. Between now and Christmas, we ought to be able to hit up 7-8 kiosks a week all over Northern Illinois and Indiana. Also...

I'm educated, active, passionate, blah blah blah.

I think the absolute best thing about me - the thing I would want to be remembered for - is that I can have fun anywhere and will bring enough to share. I can have fun while the old lady in front of me is holding up the line because she thought the grapefruit juice was 20 cents less than what the clerk is trying to charge her. Its almost superhuman. Of course, sometimes I forget to use this superpower of mine, and everything goes horribly wrong. But for the most part I would say I bring an infectious amount of enjoyment to the table. I love trying new things, going new places, and meeting new people.

I'm looking to meet an intelligent, creative, fun woman. My ideal match has a spiritual bend, seeks awareness and growth, is environmentally conscious, curious about the world and its people, and loves dogs. I don't own a dog and wouldn't expect you to, but I have a feeling if you don't love dogs even a little we wouldn't make such a good couple.

First dates should happen in a place where we can talk and get to know each other. Like in a coffee shop. Or a toy store. They should be more about the company than the activity.