Hello Gentlemen,

So what's interesting bout lil' ole me? Probably not a lot but let's take it for a spin around the dance floor shall we boys.

My friends say I'm funny, sweet and kind. Blah Blah Blah. I like old people; as I hope to be one someday. I also like animals, but more frequently act like one in the mornings.

I love the beach and walks upon it. I love sunrises and sunsets. Ofcourse I do, I live on the gulf coast of Florida!!! But the real question is do those things love you? Do you appericate the time in which it took the grain of sand to arrive on the beach upon which you walk? Do you feel rejunivated each time you bask in a sunrise? Do you stand in silence just to absorb the reverence of a sunset? No two are ever alike and if you're watching it with someone special then it doesn't matter if it's raining.

Wow..pretty heavy stuff. Let's move on to something of even greater importance. I'm pretty sure I was a pirate in a former lifetime. I have the most uncontrollable urge at the most inopportune moments to borrow shiney things that don't belong to me and bury them under a large black X. I used to take a parrot with me, but he was rather loud when he got exicted and gave my position away everytime. They don't really taste like chicken if you ask me. Do these things make me a bad person? Your call.

Let's move on to the segment of our show that I like to call "What I look for in my captives."

Physically you should be strong enough to lift the world from my sholders. Save me from a shark attack in shallow water. Keep the wolves at bay. Slay dragons and scare the crap out of the guy who looked a little too long.

Mentaly you don't have to bend spoons but you should read something other than the sports page and have an alternative to Sports Center if I'm in a real pissy mood.

Outdoor wise you need to not be afraid of snakes, the dark or things that go bump in it. You take care of the snakes and I'll take care of the dark and the things that go bump in it will take care of themselves.

Domestic wise you need to be able to fend for yourself on girls night out. Otherwise I'll share duties if you grill something for me that you caught yourself (or buy from the store and throw away the wrapper) and USDA meat. Fair 'nuf?

If you've lasted this long, thank you, I'm almost finished. Promise.

Emotionaly, my heart is battered and bruised, I'm sure yours may be too. My heart is raw and wild . It is protected but has endless bounderies. It is passionate and relentless. But most of all it is truthfull. Yours should be too.

Hoist the colors maties..second one to the treasure loses.

Dates are a tricky tricky thing. Too much one way...not enough that way. Too many expectations. Let's just meet for a drink and listen to some music. See where the everning takes us. I'm much more attentive while wearing flip flops and ordering off a menu that doubles as a placemat. Lets save the high heels and little black dress for the second go round, but then again lunch could last forever.