Once upon a time, I thought that work and career were the "hard" parts of life to figure out, and that the personal side of things would fall neatly and more or less automatically into place.

Oops. This assumption has left me with a great career, along with my family and all the friends I've gathered along the way. Which is kind of a lot to have already, if you think about it. But, being a selfish glutton, now I want the rest of the perfect life. Living in NY, having a great job, friends and family, AND BEING IN LOVE.

How many times have I sat in Starbucks drinking coffee and watching happy couples come and go, on their way to the park, or a movie, oblivious to how happy and how lucky they have it. I looking around at others, wondering what they have. Have they settled? I wonder why I can't find that kind of happiness and contentment.

What's wrong with me? I'm smart, successful, handsome, funny, and strong, and yet... I'm lost. So often I am taking that taxi, cab ride home watching the city speed by, after some triumphant moment and it is just so empty to have no one to share it with. I can't settle for something that doesn't feel like a perfect fit. I want to be in love, and I want to be loved.But obviously not with just anyone.

I can have that. What I want is to look across a crowed room, and not see anyone else other than "her." I want to be excited all the time to be with her, or simply talk. And I want to talk for hours and hours, about everything and nothing. I want to share every thought, dream, feeling and experience.

I want a phone call in the middle of the night, just because she wants me. I want to trust with my whole heart, and be trusted. I want her to understand my moods and feelings, and respect my privacy and solitude when I need it.

I don't want to have everything in common with her. I want us to each bring new things to the other to share. but, it seem that everyone looking for the "BEST", the tallest, richest, handsome. I am looking for the "RIGHT" person. The "right" person is the person who will bring the best out of you.

Tonight I am wondering if there is anyone in the universe who is in a situation similar to mine. I've noticed that when I look around, people seem to be busily making their way through life doing this and that to stay occupied But are they really happy I wonder? Perhaps they are settled in their ways already. I'm not. I feel unsettled and unsatisfied.

The Feeling is not about achievements professionally because I've been quite successful. There is no spiritual hole to fill; I have God in my life. I have family and the support that goes with it. I actually have a pretty full life. Still, I miss having a female companion.

Ok, I'm lonely. Well, a major obstacle for finding a partner is that I'm not interested in dating. In other words, I can't imagine cycling through women after women. It seems pretty brutal on the face of it. And the toll it must take on a person's mind, body and spirit. The motto is: AVOID the PAIN.

I am not into the dating game.I am not a serial dater but I realized that what we all probably know in our heart, but fail to acknowledge is that there is no perfect person awaitingour arrival. Most people love checklist consist of physically attributes that doesn't go to the core of a person's character. The beautiful blond may have a terrible problem with anger. Most people choose who they will love long before they actually meet that person.

A person can look like a movie star, but is she reliable and caring. The key question I ask myself is in the presence of this special person is do I like myself more? The smartest women knows that she always wants to be remembered for who she is, not how she looks.

An evening with me involves hot chocolate and great conversation. A relationship of kindess that elevates the lives of people involved. Life's test is how well we love.

Patiently waiting, with a pre-written email for you my dear Your Soulmate

Meeting for coffee or a drink. If the conversation is interesting and we seem to have a little connection then we can go for a bite or go shopping. Most people go to restaurants and sit far from each other like it is an interview. I rather take a walk and talk to you and get to know you, stop at a bar and have drink and get some food while we chat.