I had a nice, long, clever and complicated profile posted, but not many people were "getting it," and even fewer understood that it was satire, so I'll just state the facts: I'm a writer/producer at a cable network. I've worked in the biz for 14 years now, here in LA and in NYC. I used to write short fiction when I was younger, but that's sort of fallen by the wayside. I like to play poker, chess, fantasy sports, anything geeky like that. And I read all the time, usually science or history or fiction related to those subjects. I grew up in Georgia and Virginia, but my accent is from Anywhere, USA. I've been to about 30 states and 10 foreign countries, had a few adventures, et cetera. Random side-note: I also own a business that sells rectangular poker chips.

I do NOT believe that things happen for a reason. That is the biggest cop-out of all time. That doesn't mean I'm negative. Ok, maybe a little. I'm just a realist.

Now, on to you: I can't tell you why I haven't had a long-term relationship. You'll ask, but I won't have an answer. It's a combination of a thousand things, I'm sure. I think I'm ready, but who knows? Anyway, I want you to know I'm bad at this before you get involved. Got it? Great, thanks. I'm looking for a gorgeous, slender or athletic woman my age or ***younger*** with no kids. Oh, and please, no astrology, psychic powers, or other nonsense. I'm basically just looking for a normal, free-thinking, fun (but not crazy fun) woman.

A date without texting or cell phone conversations interrupting us would be refreshing.