If I didn’t have a sense of humility I could write for days on how phenomenal I am. Basically, I’m God’s gift to the universe. It’s true. I read it on the internet(s). So I’m going to keep this short. My humor is borderline witty/saracastic/silly but never obnoxious. I love conversation on completely random subjects. Let’s debate if the rodeo is more of a red neck sport than say NASCAR, bowling or monster trucks. I can speak without grunting and dragging my knuckles. I use my turn signal when changing lanes. There's a good chance that I was raised by a pack of wolves in a forest. I'm a participant in life and not a spectator. I'd prefer if you watch more tv and stay off of my freeways.

You know who I want to meet? I want to meet the dorks. Yeah you heard me! D-O-R-K-S. Where are the kids who had braces in high school and wore a white helmet when riding their skateboards? Where are all the honeys who still play Dungeons and Dragons? I'm tired of all these good looking people. Where do all the peeps with buck teeth and raccoon tail caps chill at? Anybody here drive a tractor? HELLO. Tractor drivers gotta represent. Is there anybody here without a tat? And one more thang, why does everyone have to listen to music that's sooooo cool? Are there no individuals out there who appreciate the powerful lyrics and sensual melodies from the boys of Bon Jovi?

When it comes to dating, I’d like to meet the one betty who could really reheat my Chicken McNugget. I’m looking to meet the girl who will make my head spin, turn my eyes backward and make my shorts explode. This person of course would have to have a good sense of humor and a wild naughty side. Smokers need not apply. Your cancer sticks make my contacts feel like sand paper. If you own a liquor store and/or you're a model with lots of money, then ignore what's above and write me immediately. Ok. Who am I kidding? Got a pulse? Say hello.

I love making friends and am hoping to make a great circle here. With me, fun times don't ever have to end, you just have to find the right people in your life to share those times with and make them the best times ever...