Here's the lyrics to a song that best represents me: Steve Miller Band - The Joker.

Some people call me the space cowboy, yeah
Some call me the gangster of love
Some people call me Maurice
Cause I speak of the pompitous of love

People talk about me, baby
Say I'm doin' you wrong, doin' you wrong
Well, don't you worry baby
Don't worry
Cause I'm right here, right here, right here, right here at home

Cause I'm a picker
I'm a grinner
I'm a lover
And I'm a sinner
I play my music in the sun

I'm a joker
I'm a smoker
I'm a midnight toker
I sure don't want to hurt no one

I'm a picker
I'm a grinner
I'm a lover
And I'm a sinner
I play my music in the sun

I'm a joker
I'm a smoker
I'm a midnight toker
I get my lovin' on the run
Wooo Wooooo

You're the cutest thing
That I ever did see
I really love your peaches
Want to shake your tree
Lovey-dovey, lovey-dovey, lovey-dovey all the time
Ooo-eee baby, I'll sure show you a good time

Cause I'm a picker
I'm a grinner
I'm a lover
And I'm a sinner
I play my music in the sun

I'm a joker
I'm a smoker
I'm a midnight toker
I get my lovin' on the run

I'm a picker
I'm a grinner
I'm a lover
And I'm a sinner
I play my music in the sun

I'm a joker
I'm a smoker
I'm a midnight toker
I sure don't want to hurt no one

Wooo Woooo

People keep talking about me baby
They say I'm doin' you wrong
Well don't you worry, don't worry, no don't worry mama
Cause I'm right here at home


Hey, Hi, Sup, Yo, What's shalakin. It seems you've stumbled across my profile s'anks to my beautiful and oh so charming pose of me airing out my crusty arm pits. Yes, it's a lovely past time I've always cherished. I'm laid back, I like to have fun. There really isn't much to say, aside from the fact that I am fun to hang out with. Actually no, that's a lie.

I'm here to make friends with awesome and cool people and use them to elevate my status in society. That's right, it's every man, child and women for themselves! I work a lot, so I really have no life outside of my apartment. I'm a full time G.C. (General Contractor.) Yes, you can call me mister fix it. And I'll laugh at you. Why, I don't know. It's beyond my own reasoning, really. I'm really only typing all of this so you can bust a gut, and shed those tears of joy! Let's see, I love metal and all it's variations of music (that does not exclude everything else, I have a passion for raw and intensive things. Music aside.)

I have far too many friends of the opposite sex, but then again. I wouldn't have it any other way. Why, because my friends are bad ass. I also do part time security for frat houses, with my buds. So technically, my lifestyle demands that I make friends, and not lovers. Love is boring anyways, becomes a chore after a while. I'm no joker, I'm just a straight shooter. Yes, that sounded corny. And cheesy. I really don't know what else to say, don't be shy. Don't be scared. Let's be friends! Unite under the banner of 420. Whaddya say? I've got a gas mask! ;D


***DISCLAIMER!***(For all intentional purposes, I have no reason to be serious about this, which is why you just read all the inane bullsh*t only to get this disclaimer. Simply put, I came back from the sandbox overseas about two years ago, and I'm here to make friends. And just meet awesome people!) Yes, I'm the bad boy your friends and family told you to stay the **** away from.

On my first date,(If I even got that far.) I would build you a chariot and take you around town. Dressed as Santa Clause. Why? ...why not?