My mind and body cannot compare to my antique toe nail clipping collection, which I jealously guard. I want a girl who only wants me for my money, is devoid of feelings, totally selfish, and who will brutalise me.

- I have a unique talent for dressing scruffily, without even trying.

[Rod Stewart can look like he's been dragged through a hedge backwards, but he spends hours at it and has an entourage of people helping him... did you know he once had to cancel a concert because his voice got better?]

I meet most people in the usual fashion - but if you have any kinky ideas I could be up for it... will try anything once as long as it doesn't have a greater than 30% chance of killing me ;o) and can be taken most places in public.... failing this, you can always lead me back to the same deserted spot where you've buried all your previous victims.


You might message me if:-

- you are reading this and have a ski chalet in the Alps and are looking for backgammon lessons in exchange for seeing my banana yellow racing boots and classic cut slalom skis;

- like me you're logged in while away doing other tasks, but are always up for a little stimulating interaction... or alternatively you'd care to challenge me on the Virgin Game (ooops, that's on another site!);

- you're staring at this screen as well but would rather go for a bare-foot kick around in the park... football Brazilian style! (ok, "soccer" if I'm simultaneously translating from my mother tongue into American);

- you enjoy a warm cuddle, as I look forward to snuggling under the covers on dank Sunday mornings and playing in the rain with you on more inspiring ones;

- you're a really sensual kisser!



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NB: I can do a pretty good impression of a Taoist frog sitting on its lily pad waiting for its princess to saunter along by and smother it in kisses... so if I don't hear from you first you're unlikely to be hearing from me.
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the photo Nazis have been taking down my more 'unusual' pictures - it's so nice to see someone really cares enough; it truly warms the heart...


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