Here Goes a Big Whatever:
Here’s the new deal. I don’t really feel the need to spell everything out about myself in great detail. If I do that, then there doesn’t seem to be much to talk about. I do like to talk about many things such as Love in general, life experiences, aspirations, art, music, movies and philosophy. I have several personal goals which I feel I am approaching steadily. If you would like the details ask and I will tell. (tell a lie perhaps, but at least I will tell.) There isn’t an idea in my mind that I hold so strongly that I may not reject it later. That is also to say I am open minded. And no I will not be lying at this time. Withholding information is more interesting.

I am passionate about music both in making it and listening to it. However, I mostly play for my own personal enjoyment and occasionally for a loved one. Even though I have made money making music as well, it is not my profession. I probably share a different taste in music than most people do. People I have found are generally passionate about the music they listen to. The interesting part is why? What is it that makes you attracted to a particular song, artist, group, genera or composer? Is there a song or piece of music that will generates an intense response of you or drive you to have a spiritual experience? What kind of emotional response do you get from the music you hear? If the emotion or thought could have been expressed in words it might not have been written as music, so I understand that some of these questions don’t have answers. It’s like asking someone why their favorite color is purple. But trying to answer them proves to me that there is something deeper about us, something that can barely be expressed in words if at all. This is the type of consciousness that generates music and the arts which I find so fascinating. Sorry, I’m probably boring you to death here, but I find it all very interesting.


Similarly, people look for different emotional responses when selecting a movie or a book. Some opt for laughter, other fear and adrenalin rushes; yet others, joy, sorrow or romance. Either way there is a sense of emptiness felt at the end of a movie or a book. I don’t know if you’ve ever felt it. It’s as if there was more excitement and intensity in that story then life has to offer. This idea is both true and false. It’s true because in stories’ reality is generally exaggerated to create more drama; therefore more excitement. The idea is false because nothing is more real and produces real excitement than experiencing life itself.

I want to believe that life is exiting and that it does have much to offer. To find the one who will discover life with me could be a wonder. I will discover life as it comes along either way but to share discoveries with someone would certainly make it more meaningful. Even though, deep down we are mostly the same, altogether, consciously, we are very different. We hide our differences to wear our social masks, because we don’t want to show how different we are to other people. And in turn people don’t want us to be very different from them either.


Well, my personality is not something fixed. We are all constantly changing. But I tend to be a calm spirit. Aggression is something I would seldom if ever need. I can be funny; I do believe I have a sense of humor whether or not it’s your sense of humor we’ll have to find out. Depending on who I’m with, I might be down-right silly, but for the most part I tend to be relaxed and passive and would consider myself to be serious-minded. Some situations inspire me to be very talkative and very excited about what I’m saying. Other times I’ve kept my words to a minimum. I warm up to people very well, just not always right away. If I say something mean, I was joking and people usually get it. If I believe something is right I will not sell myself out. To many, I have appeared to be outgoing. But that is only the case, because I have put myself out there. By nature I am an introverted person which I believe means the focus of my attention is generally on myself or that I tend to be self-conscious. Either way, I have not allowed my nature to determine how I am.


I think sometimes people here will believe I am odd, strange, or weird because I lose a lot of that social mask here in this medium. I tend to want to write what I really think. My true self comes out which would come out eventually if we were face-to-face, but only after you were convinced that I was “normal”. But here I have never been “normal”. I wouldn’t know how most of the time. When I write you a message, when I write these words now I can only be myself however odd, or unusual it may seem. Strangely, if I have gotten a response so far it was because I kept most of my true self hidden and not expressed. Over time that affect has dissipated, more and more of myself is coming through with every word, and I don’t care what anyone thinks. I will admit that being misunderstood is very flustering. What else could we expect from human beings? If I am misunderstood by one then someone else will understand better.

I would like to go to this ice skating ring that's near my house and I've never been. If not I would be happy to just go to a park by the lake and talk or find a nice film preferably a romantic comedy (not necessary a girly movie like "the holiday"(hee,hee), but more like "when harry met sally" Honestly I like most genera of classic movies.) With friends I would put some popcorn in the microwave and watch it at home. I would ride almost anywhere gas is cheap, go to the beach, go to a karioki, or do the karioki at home(once we know each other). The important thing is to enjoy life to the fullest while having that human connection.

Here is an idea form lesbaingirl863 that I really dig:
"take dated out to beach walk along beach dance under stars and lay looking up at stars and talk about plans and future.... and after take date on candle light dinner and set by fire place and drink wine and talk.....and take to movies or bowling or playing pool..and if my date likes video games we play some games.."