I will submit completely to a woman who knows when and how to compliment a man when he is feeling pretty? I believe a well-behaved monkey is deserving of quality footwear. Im semi-buoyant in water. Sometimes, the awesome responsibility of opposable thumbs overwhelms me. I can lift heavy objects above my head . . . like Poland. I enjoy hiding, track (but not field), liquids, books with lots of pictures, bathing my own cat, and odorless situations. Squirrels dressed-up as little lumberjacks frighten me.

Im looking for that woman who will take life seriously and is allowed to use sharp utensils with minimal supervision. Im seeking someone who can appreciate the effort I put into making my own clothes; a common gal, but with the unique ability to deduce anything and everything about a person by simply licking their forehead (not their own . . . but now that I think about it . . .

Attending mediocre banjo concerts, fine boxed wine,plenty of waxed paper,cuddling to Aldo Nova, creating elaborate yet sometimes dangerous balloon animals, redundancy, and. . most important . . odorless situations!