im new to this internet dating thing, just thought ide try it out..



There’s a big diff between who you are; opposed to what you are. i myself am a natural humanitarian, socially conscious, and deeply concerned about the state of the world. i hold great compassion with a hint of idealism mixed with a realistic business mindset. i have a pretty broad outlook on life; in fact so broad all i see is the big picture rather than the minute details. i enjoy all walks of life however corny that may sound. life’s way to short to get caught up with peoples social biases and political preferences. instead, im tryin to evaluate others on the basis of what they can do for the larger cause, but at the same time cutting all governs over the cause. i guess im just a egalitarian by nature and ide like to be a teacher to the masses or a holistic healer of some sort. need i remind you ill forever be an asset addict, finding new and creative ways to leverage my money to work itself so i do not have to.

ive failed to let myself accept the imperfections of the world and im often disappointed by the realities of life: the shortcomings of others....including my own. ive come to realize there’s no progress until you stop lying to yourself and face your fears, misconceptions, and lies that you tell yourself everyday; so you can go on livin a goody two shoes existence while simultaneously denying all self-hood. only then after re-evaluating your paradigm will you come to grips with who you truly are....

...that being said i lack the perspective that would allow me to enjoy life more fully. knowingly, after accepting all these faults i still struggle to accept my natural limitations both in the physical and aetheric plane. i know it dont make much sense and this wont either but i've come to grips that the key to my personality is the necessity of sacrifice. im slowly having to learn to let go of material possessions and relationships; its as if im cursed with the inherent lesson of holding on too tightly to anything for too long causes pain. its cool i accept my faults just as i accept my disproportionate nose.

Furthermore im enlightened with the thought that the most successful and satisfying road for me would be the one of sharing and sacrificing for a larger goal without expecting anything in return.(that’s when im the happiest) as i always say “theres no key to happiness, happiness itself is the key”. according to numerology when sh*thits the fan i get a lil moody, become aloof, and withdrawn. sometimes timid, uncertain, ungrateful, and at my worst i put the blame for my faults on other people and the world. as humbled as possible i like to think i have a gift for examining my life objectively, at some distance and free from all emotion.

best lesson learned....
By openly facing my shortcomings, as well as my strengths, i develop equilibrium. i am then able to love and better understand myself and all of life. On top of that I ****in love me some early mourning coffee brewin rocky mountain freedom and it comes down to me avoiding the imprisonment of illusory security because only then am i able to bring forth any abilities or contributions. when it comes to my underlying urge, true motivation, talents and abilities, and my general direction in life. i have ah overpowering need for independence...im supremely individualistic and i ****in' cant stand routines!
When i first meet people i put up a censoring device both in terms of what i send out, as well as what i allow to come in which is ah aspect of my personality...which is more narrow and protective than the real me. i am somewhat impersonal and may be difficult to get to know. and im really not demonstrative of my affections, even though i often have deep feelings. My strength lies with being able to understand people and their underlying conditions of a conflict. "I GET RIGHT THE HEART OF THE MATTER, BECUASE ITS THE HEART THAT MATTERS MOST"

i sometimes rely too heavily on friends and family to provide my solace instead of handling the situation directly and responsibly. i usually retreat to the good feelings provided by people not involved in my situation.
Responsibility is the issue here. i helped create the situation in the first place, and i am an essential part of the solution. i must accept my role.

thats the gist

I apologize to you if I don't seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don't like the feeling. You're sitting there, you're wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I'm not really interested, should I play like I'm interested but I'm not that interested but I think she might be interested but do I want to be interested but now she's not interested? So all of the sudden I'm getting, I'm starting to get interested... And when am I supposed to kiss her? Do I have to wait for the door cause then it's awkward, it's like well goodnight. Do you do like that ass-out hug? Where you like, you hug each other like this and your ass sticks out cause you're trying not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don't kiss them at all? It's very difficult trying to read the situation. And all the while you're just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions? Perhaps play a little game called "just the tip". Just for a second, just to see how it feels. Or, ouch, ouch you're on my hair.~~~BaHAHA classic

to care or plead silence, weak hands are calming....