This is always the hardest part of the profile. I'm me, quiet and shy sometimes, loud and outgoing other times. I like to have fun, but I work hard too. I love my job, but it takes up a lot of my time. I lived in Calgary for 9 years, then I tried living in Newfieland for about 4 months and now I'm back in Sask. I love tattoos, music and movies of any kind, curling ...dunno, if you want to know more give me a holler calgary king at hot mail.

Requirements to contact me, YOU MUST BE:
1) Over 5 feet tall. Midget sex just doesn't satisfy me the way it used to.
2) Not offended by my impressive schlong.
3) Willing to gain an excessive amount of weight and take an interest in wearing spandex and fanny packs. Sorry to you thin or athletic girls.. it just doesn't look as good on you.
4) Easily impressed and willing to lower your standards for me.
5) Able to have a conversation but also be willing to not talk for the mostpart.
6) Willing to run slower than me if we are being chased by a wild animal or a dragon so that you will be eaten instead of me.
7. Willing to have a long term relationship for the night.
8) Relatively Normal, if not then heavily medicated should do.
9) Interested in women as well, just like me!
10) Eager to get naked on special occassions.. ex holidays with the family. Don't be getting any ideas about trying that on the dinner table... that's what the dessert table is there for. Whipped cream bikini, Grandma? Yeah, that's right I just said that.. that's just how we roll where I come from. Welcome to the DARK SIDE.. now turn around and run for dear life.

Disclaimer: The above profile is mostly fictional and should not be taken seriously. Anyone who may have been offended by this content is clearly gay and should be destroyed immediately. Individual results may vary. In the event that you are not satisfied with your purchase, please return me to receive a 10% refund along with a complimentary gift.

Depends, supper and a movie, maybe drinks after...I'm not much of a dancer, but for the right person I'd be willing to learn.