Huzzah!

JUST THE FACTS:

1) I'm a good talker, but I'm a great listener, and I try not to take over any conversation. Expect me to try to make you laugh your ass off almost repeatedly.

2) I'm a black belt in Taekwondo, and a green belt in Jiu-Jitsu, which legally qualifies me as a badass. I haven't practiced in years, but I can still probably kill someone five times before they hit the ground.

3) I have a VERY diverse iPod, as I have a lot of different tastes in music. Heavy metal is pretty much my favorite, though I also like thrash metal, speed metal, rock, alternative, hip-hop, cheesy-ass 80s and 90s stuff, oldies, country, classical, punk, new wave, death metal, hair metal, and even stuff like video game and TV themes, amongst other stuff.

...except for Nickelback. God, I hate them. I wish that they would just get trampled on by elephants already. And Linkin Park. And Hinder. And ICP needs to be gored by angry rhinos. So lame.

4) I currently work as a CSR for drugstore.com, which I'm currently enjoying. Huzzah~! At least it's better than what I could be doing, but not as good as what I should be doing, if you can wrap your heads around that. I'm a graphic designer by trade, and I'm looking for something in that kind of field. Either that, or data entry. I like typing, as you can see by this BEAST of a profile.

5) "The following is an announcement from the National Pancake Institute: F*** Waffles" - George Carlin

6) I like to stay active, so I can keep off those "Few Extra Pounds". I love to go for walks, and I bowl the odd time. Sports I like to watch are baseball, hockey, football, basketball, MMA, and especially wrestling (yeah, I know it's choreographed, but work with me here).

7) Don't worry, ladies. I'm not into the whole "head games" thing. If I wanted to play games, I'd fire up my PS2 or XBox. Playing Guitar Hero, Rock Band, and even SingStar is much more fun anyways, though I'm also into the old-school gaming. I loves my old Nintendo and arcade games.

8) No animals were harmed in the making of this profile. However, several humans were killed.

9) SIX-HUNDRED POUND PENGUIN! Oh, sorry. Just thought I'd say something that would break the ice.

I'm looking for someone who has a good sense of humor, whether corny, sarcastic, filthy, whathaveyou. Someone who's just as comfortable sitting around watching TV or listening to music on the couch, as they are going out dancing or dining. Just someone who knows how to have a fun time. Oh, and I'm not too picky when it comes to appearance. Personality, like diamonds and herpes, lasts forever, while looks fade away, like that sandwich I left in the radiator when I was five. Damn, I just made myself hungry...

I try to avoid first dates, because they're all awkward and stuff. And I tend to avoid second dates, as I want to skirt the sophomore jinx. So, for our third date, I'm extremely flexible, but there's usually a drink involved in there somewhere, whether it be the security blanket "coffee" date, or going out for some of "Grandpa's Old Cough Medicine". I'll try anything once. Don't take that sentence too literally though. I'd want to build up trust before I allow handcuffs and dripping candle wax to become involved in the proceedings.