Stuck On Stupid, Sittin On Silly, Waitin For Dumb.

I am breaking out of my shell and becoming a peanut!

To those of you that have asked: Yes, as a matter of fact I am good in bed, I can sleep for days.

I just moved here from Pittsburgh and I am still getting settled, but I love it here.

This was written with humor. If you don't understand that, PLEASE do not write me. Also to everyone that is writing that wants to save my soul, Thanks, but I heard I'm already on His favorites list.

If I Like you, I may "tweet" you to a drink, I may "tweet" you to icecream, heck I might even "tweet" you to dinner.
However, no matter how much I like you I will not tweet to your twitter.


Statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons are suffering from
some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're
okay, then it's you.

I took a pain pill, Why are you still here?

The Last man I got undressed for was Mr. Bubble

There are two sides to every divorce . . . Yours
and Shithead's.

I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a
screamer or a moaner.

I don't approve of political jokes. I've seen
too many of them get
elected.

I love being married. It's so great to find that
one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear
Mom's wise words:
"Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been!"

Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.

There are two types of people in this world -- good and bad.
The good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more.


****UPDATE*****

Some of the rules I have learned so far:

Must love Animals, Ok but I draw the line at snakes and lizards (that includes lounge lizards)
Must look good on the back of my bike, Ok I'll wear my tiara and work on my princess wave
My kids are #1, Gee I thought that honor belonged to Hertz
Apparently I am the only one in the world that does not have Yahoo, Not to be confused with the yummy chocolate drink YooHoo (I have that)
No Game Players, Darn I so enjoy Naked Twister
No Baggage, and after I spent all that money on a matching set
No Cheaters,~~~~Sigh~~~~~ That is the only way I win at Monopoly
No Liars, Well there goes my Poker game.
I don't "Shout" or "Holla". I will however answer most first E-Mails politely.

I will continue to add more as I find them out. My mission is to spread the word so everyone can reap the benefits of my hard work.


**My Ideal Match**
Happy, Upbeat, Takes care of himself, Does Not have a Victim Mentality (blames everyone else for his problems) and MUST love pancakes on Sunday Morning.


****If you are young enough to be my son and you are e-mailing to ask me out, rest assured I will treat you the same way I do my sons. With the exceptions of cooking you dinner and baking you a birthday cake.*****

The only Time you should look down on someone, is when you are picking them up.

All the things you need to know about me:

I am searching for a reason to stop searching.

I am Not royalty, so I do Not want, nor do I have any need to be treated like a princess.

Plays well with others, Charming, Funny, Colors outside the lines and if I'm feeling really bold I run with scissors. Even though I'm catholic I rarely go to church. I practice my own religion, it's called being nice, it's probably because I strongly believe in Karma. I work out 5 days a week and keep in shape. So if your idea of staying fit is mowing the lawn once a week we probably would not be a good fit. Also if your idea of entertainment is watching cars go around in circles to see who can go the fastest, believe me, we would not be a good fit. I do volunteer work at a local organization and I will not give that up. Actually I would hope you would join me or have something that you are commited to. My feelings on volunteer work are strong as I have been blessed in my life. I have a happy healthy family, friends that care, food to eat, a roof over my head and a job, so that is my way of giving back.

My Motto: When life hands you lemons reach for the Tequila.

I am not looking for someone to "Complete" me. I am already a complete person. Heck I still have my tonsils. What I am looking for is someone to share my life. The good and the bad, the ups and downs, the smiles, laughter and tears.
I had my drama gene removed a very long time ago, so I keep it at a minimim in my life, I would hope you do as well.



***While I understand confession is good for the soul, I am not a priest. So if after a few E-Mails or phone calls, you have to tell me you lied about your age, marital status or your picture was taken 40+ pounds ago Please do Not contact me. I am not perfect and have my flaws like everyone else, but if you have lied about such things all that will do is make me wonder what else you will lie so easily about. If you are not comfortable with who you are, how can you expect anyone else to be?****

~~~I am ANTI-DRUG and YES, I consider Pot a Drug!!~~~

The infamous Favorites list: I am in the process of deleting names on it.While I am very flattered, I am not Jan Brady so I don't care about being the most popular girl. If you add me and do not contact me, I will delete you.


Do not go where the path may lead, Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail. Emerson

One other important you need to know about me, If you care more about money and things than you do about people please keep fishing.

*In The End What We Regret Most Are The Chances We Never Took**

While you are reaching for the brass ring, dont forget to enjoy the merry-go-round.

******NO PICTURE, NO REPLY*****


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----\\\- ///---
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----///--\\\--- For my dear friend, Patrick


......... ....O...... ..... ........Please put this
.......... ....\.....O...... ......on your
........... .../...../....... ......profile
........... ...\.....\........ .....if you
........... ...... ..../....... ......know
........ ....O.... .........O......someone
...... ....../.... ..O....../......who really
............\.......\......\......should have
............/... .....|..../.....been a
.......... ......... ../....... ......blowjob!

Picture from 07/07

Browsing a great used book store. Going to Brookstone and sitting in the massage chairs. Really, it doesn't matter how or where it begins, what's important is how it ends.