Profession
Professional bad example
Do you want children?
Prefer Not To Say
About Me
My clothes are 100% ORGANIC...65% Baby Seal, 25% Panda, and 10% Manatee.
Not recommended for women who are nursing, pregnant, or may become pregnant.
Your, you're, then, than, their, they're, there, are, our, to, too, two...are you aware that these words exist? Do you know when and where to use them? If so, I want to hear from you.
The police often question me, just because they find me interesting. I have a sandwich named after me on every continent. I keep a phone book just so i can rip it in half. If they built a monument to me, Mount Rushmore would have to close due to lack of business. I once punched a magician. Thats right, you heard me. When i order a salad, I get the dressing right on top of the salad, where it belongs... where there is no going back. My beard alone has experienced more than a lesser man's entire body. My blood smells like cologne. I have been known to cure narcolepsy by simply walking into the room. My organ donation card also lists my beard. I am a lover, but also a fighter -- so don't get any crazy ideas.
I am the most interesting man in the world.
Check all that apply.
___A girl with a set work schedule that can actually make plans ahead of time.
___A girl who keeps in shape.
___A girl who likes to watch movies curled up on the couch.
___A girl who doesn't have to be out at a bar every night.
___A girl who can cook something other than mac n cheese.
___A girl who doesn't mind getting dirty outside.
___A girl who is not a flaming liberal.
___A girl whose biological clock is not ticking like a timebomb.
Do you measure up?
I do not wear striped shirts.
I do not drink Jagerbombs.
I do not valet park.
I do not play Golden Tee.
I like venturing out to see live bands or hanging out on a patio with a cold drink when the weather is right.
I can cook better than you.
I have a jetski that I seldom get to use.
I've snow skied in 5 different states and 1 province.
I have a motorcycle.
I don't like the fact that there are no good places to camp in north Texas.
I don't own a PS3, Xbox or any other couch potato game system.
I'm a pretty good pool player.
I watch a lot of movies.
I rescued 2 cats. Cats are superior to dogs. Who really wants a kid that never grows up?
I have an awesome set of power tools.
I play paintball (weather permitting).
my space addy is el_jefe_de_jefes
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This was forwarded to me in an email and I found it amusing.
Translation of Women's personal ad terms...
40-ish.........................................49
Adventurous.......................Slept with everyone
Athletic......................................No tits
Average looking..................................Ugly
Beautiful..........................Pathological liar
Contagious Smile..................Does a lot of pills
Emotionally secure......................On medication
Feminist.......................................Fat
Free spirit....................................Junkie
Friendship first..........................Former slut
Fun.........................................Annoying
New-Age.................Body hair in the wrong places
Open-minded.................................Desperate
Outgoing........................Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate...............................Sloppy drunk
Professional...................................****
Voluptuous...................................Very Fat
Large frame................................Hugely Fat
Wants Soul mate...............................Stalker
First Date
Let's start with drinks.
Last 5 el_jefe_tx Forum Posts
Mail Settings (To message el_jefe_tx you MUST meet the following criteria.)
Female
Age between 18 and 45
Live in United States
Must not be looking for Talk/E-mail
Must not do drugs
Must not be married
el_jefe_tx Appears on 5 members favorites lists and has 2 roses that can be sent.
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