After a brief hiatus, I'm dipping my toes back in the pond with renewed optimism and a sense of clarity (I think…). It’s been said that brevity is the soul of wit, which I guess makes me witless. This journey we call life has taught me several things: I've no desire for screaming "conversations" with half drunken strangers in bars, the only smoke I’ll inhale comes from a barbecue and I don’t need chemicals to make my life more interesting (that said, I'm not averse to a pint with friends).

Having long since dispelled youthful notions of immortality, I tend towards less injurious pursuits (unless I’m on holidays …), so if you’re searching for that special someone to join you in Xtreme pursuits, you’d best click on your browser's back arrow as I’m not your man.

Like everyone I’m in search of inner peace, global harmony, the meaning of life and next week’s lottery numbers (it’s much easier being introspective when you can give it your undivided attention). When it comes to a partner I have set of outrageously demanding criteria:
a) Must be gainfully employed (definitions are open for discussion) but not consumed by work
b) Is financially stable i.e. not on the verge of bankruptcy owing to Manolos or LV handbags
c) Likes to travel and can handle the gamut of accommodations from hostels to Hyatts
d) Doesn’t consider drinking a sport or frequent a bar where everybody knows your name
e) Thinks I’m funny i.e. will generally laugh with me and not at me (unless it’s called for)
f) Knows the difference between your and you’re
g) Takes care of herself i.e. does not smoke, considers McDonalds an occasional guilty pleasure and hits the gym occasionally
h) Enjoys moonlit walks and the majesty of thunderstorms (just don’t stand too close to me – my dad’s been struck by lightning twice and I don’t know if it's an inherited trait...)
i) As I was not blessed with psychic abilities I need someone who is capable of clear and honest communication i.e. needs, desires, feelings, etc. Seriously, I can not stress this point enough.

If you’re still reading, you’re probably wondering, “So what’s so special about you Mr. Demandy?" I'm tallish, dark (well, hair at least), and children don’t run screaming from the sight of me. I make it to the gym several times a week so I can confidently state that I’m borderline fit. I can carry on a conversation on a wide range of subjects, am an avid listener and can't lie to save my life, so won’t waste either of our time trying.

I enjoy my work, but realize that it is a means to an end: my flexible schedule has allowed me to explore the world at large - as of last count I'm up to 22 countries and always looking to add a few more. I've conquered my Buffy addiction, but still have the film monkey on my back; thankfully as a film reviewer I can justify myself (my story and I’m sticking to it…) I’m the one you’ll hear laughing out loud in the theatre or reading the comics, and know when to be funny and when to be serious. I appreciate the difference between alone and lonely.

I believe there is a distinct gulf between acquaintances and friends, value loyalty and my word is my bond. I’m not ready for an instant family, am allergic to cats and don’t like brussel sprouts. I’m tactile, passionate, like giving massages, not afraid of PDA's (either electronic or physical) and know when to be naughty and when to be nice.

Most importantly I’ve learned never say “never” (well, except as an example).

Getting to know one another over some liquid libations (or ice cream) while walking the seawall. If we detect that glimmer of a spark, the sky's the limit...