I am a tall, thin, in shape woman with long legs
(see pictures above*), a great smile and an even better personality. I also have a great sense of humor! I am of mixed race: African American, German, Native American and Irish. I am intelligent, very quick witted, kind, sincere and honest.
*Objects in pictures may appear better in person. LOL! 
Now it's quiz time, baby. Let's have some fun.
Are you single?[] Yes
[] No
[] Shhh! You might wake my wife...
Do you have a conjoined twin?[] Yes
[] No
[] Hey! You get two for the price of one!
Do you have a triple nipple (doubles as a math question, haha!)?[] Yes
[] No
[] Does a third head count?
Do you have a job?[] Yes
[] No
[] Does robbing and stealing count?
[] I'm a professional man-whore and it pays... in STDs!
[] Collecting that welfare check is work enough!
Is chivalry dead?[] Yes and I killed it!
Single-handedly![ ] No, at least, I'm still a gentleman.
[] It's on it's last leg, sister...
[] Open your own damn door!
Is your profile littered with txt-speak, horrible spelling and/or ALL CAPS?[] Yes
[] No
[] U B SO HAWT! O RLY? YA RLY! K, L8R! XOXO
Do you have more than 5 sentences in your profile?[] Yes
[] No
[] Sure, and they basically all allude to sex and/or not wanting to date "fat chicks".
Do you have RECENT, CLEAR pictures on your profile?[] Yes
[] No
[] No way! I don't want my girlfriend to see me on here!
Do you currently look like your pictures?[] Yes
[] No
[] Sure, I looked like my photos... twenty years ago!
[] I'm using someone else's pictures but don't tell anyone, k?
Do you have any children?[] Yes
[] No
[] Umm... Should I count the one(s) I don't pay child support for, never see and/or refuse to acknowledge?
Are you fit and in shape?[] Yes
[] No
[] Hey, round is considered a shape too!
Do you have a "muffin top"?[] Yes
[] No
[] I like butter on my muffin top! Don't you?
[] Screw the six pack! I gots me a keg!
Do you have all your hair and teeth (Wisdom teeth optional)?[] Yes, I have all my hair on my head and all of my teeth.
[] Umm... Does back hair count?
[] I'm a "Summer Teeth": Got sum'mer my teeth and sum'mer 'em I don't.
Do you still have an Ex in the picture?[] Yes and we still see each other/sleep together.
[] Yes and she's a psycho.
[] No, no exes still hanging around.
[] She's not physically still around but I'm still hung up on her anyway.
[] I've got tons of pictures of my ex. Wanna see?
Man-scaping aka "Trimming the Hedges"?[] Yes
[] No, its a jungle down there!
[] I barely bathe none the less shave/trim/man-scape!
[] What? Me ruin my ratty bird's nest of man-love? NO WAY!
Do you shave your face regularly?[] Yes
[] No
[] Only when the moon is in the 5th rising otherwise my favorite sports team might loose.
Are you a sports fanatic/freak/junkie?[] Yes
[] No
[] Don't ask me questions right now! I'm watching the game!!
Do you have good table manners?[] Yes
[] No
[] I inhale my food like a starved animal then go after yours.
[] I eat with my mouth open. Hey, you said you loved seafood. Now you can SEE my FOOD as I'm chewing it!
[] The "Shovel Method" all the way, baby!
Have you ever been married?[] Yes but I'm divorced now.
[] Yes and I'm still married.
(DO NOT PASS GO! GO STRAIGHT TO JAIL!!)[] No, never been married.
[] Separated
(YOU'RE STILL MARRIED! GET A DIVORCE ALREADY!!)[] I don't believe in marriage. It's a tool constructed by the woman to keep the man down.
Are you paying attention?[] Yes
[] No
[] Huh? What?
Have you ever considered selling a body part on eBay?[] Yes
[] No
[] Hey, God gave me two kidneys for a reason, right?
Have you ever considered selling a body part on Craigslist?[] Yes
[] No
[] Hey, God gave me two testicles for a reason, right?
Do you have a mullet or a skullet?[] No, none of the above.
[] Yes, mullets rock! Well, at least everyone in my trailer park thinks so!
[] Yes, skullets rock! When you're lacking on top make up for it in the back!
Do you have a sense of humor?[] Yes and I think you're funny.
[] Yes but I don't think you're funny.
[] No and I still don't think you're funny.
[] WTF is a sense of humor? Is that like an STD? Can I catch it from taking this quiz?
^^^ Yes, I made up this quiz all by myself. It's 100% me and my ability to find the silly and fun in even the most banal, mundane and boring of tasks as filling out an online profile.
I have dated different ethnicities and races and found that I have the best relationships with
CAUCASIAN MEN so that is my preference.
I love very tall men so if you are 6'3" or taller you get Brownie Points*.
*Brownie Points awarded upon verification of height. Not redeemable for cash. Void where prohibited.It's okay if you're not 6'3" or taller. You'll just have to be at least 5'10". (BTW, there are other ways of earning Brownie Points*.)
*Brownies Points not USDA approved. Like those Chinese Buns, may contain cat meat and/or cardboard.Lastly, I have a mantra that doubles for packing for trips as well as baggage in life:
PACK LIGHT! Like an airline: You get to bring ONE small carry-on. If you cannot fit your baggage in the overhead compartment or under your seat you do NOT get to fly KitNbootz Airline! CHECK YOUR BAGGAGE AT THE GATE*!
*Not responsible for lost or stolen baggage. All passengers subject to random strip searches and crotch inspections. 
I'm just a great girl with a sense of humor looking for a great guy with a sense of humor.
Thank you so much and Happy Fishing.
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