Help! I'm a screenwriter stuck in life's 2nd act. Dialogue first, then comes the action. I am physically, emotionally, and psychologically available -- please be gentle. You should be this tall ==> for this ride.

Wanted: Female, warm and breathing -- warm and breathing are optional. Did I mention a good sense of humor. Low expectations help... I don't like to disappoint. I look like the love child of Roseanne Barr and PeeWee Herman and sound like Fran Dresser. A long term relationship is an extended weekend -- right?

39-40 was the best ten years of my life. Carpe Momento. You want Honesty, I'm really 29 and seeking a cougar. Meow. Got catnip!

Life is an incredible journey - but I took the 'road less traveled', the one with pot holes, detours, road block, detours, road under construction, and don't ask directions. Okay, I'm lost. Navigator needed.


Ying seeks Yank: Object- Yo! I still have an athletic body... Ah...Sumo wrestling is a sport, right? An hour-glass figure with shifting sand. Hurry, I'm reaching my expiration date.

I'm seeking my first ex. I'm single, never married (you could have guessed). I never make the same mistake... ah... once. All the baggage is my own, packs small for travelling. Impulse means not having to pack a lunch.

The photo is recent but not recent enough. The was a tragic murder/suicide. Van was pushed by Dyke in front of a fast moving razor, then he jump in front of it also. It was gone in a moment. Now, the eyebrows are the only facial hair remaining and they get nervous everytime they hear that sound. "Buzz!"

Speaking of photos, I have a photographic memory... but everything's kind of fuzzy. I think I'm out of film. We can always wait together and see what develops.

Never talk about religion (Our Lady of the Holy Agnostics) or politics (Middle of the Road - at rush hour - look out!!).

I mention a sense of humor, didn't I. I try... or was that I'm trying?

If you always do what you've always done, then always expect what you got is what you'll always get. In the immortal words of a 60's beer commercial: life is precious, life is short, "you only go round once in life, so reach for all the gusto." Gusto comes in a sexy black dress?

My hands are licensed by the International Brotherhood of Magicians, a graduate from the Academy of Magical Arts which translates to "slow hands - fast fingers". Oh. Don't mind the rope in the bed - it's for an escape trick - honest.

An old dog (59 Plus) who loves new tricks. You can teach me, but is a slow learner - needs to practice it over and over. One more time, please? What I used to do all night long, now takes me all night to do.

I seek someone who lives on the edge of life but is grounded with possibilities. I want to start with a mental, physical and emotional crescendo of uncontrolled passion and quickly taper down to a friendship... or is it vice-ah verse-ah?

My glass is neither half-full or half-empty, it's over-flowing! Monogany, Is that a type of wood? And Please, no more naked pictures. Did I mention, sense of humor.

Definitely not a player. Ah... your move.

Describe what I would do on a First date? I'd show up.

Thinking about it, how about saving time and cut to the chase, as they say. Forget the first couple of dates all together, and go out on our fifth date first. Less awkward.