Nah...I don't, but I did get your attention nonetheless. Does it really matter what I write in this little box??!! First you are going to look at my pic, if you like what you see, then height (and age), then profession and then income, then make a judgment. You most likely won't even peruse the text (yes...yes..admit it, you are that shallow, and it's true I am a cynic and perhaps a tad sarcastic). I'm not sure why I even went to the trouble of writing this. BTW, do you like my dancing banana?

If you are a "normal" girl (height-weight proportionate), looking for a long term relationship with a great guy, and like what you see, then feel free to contact me with your inquiries. BTW, I'm not looking for an online e-mail romance, or to be the No. 20 in your queue, so if you aren't ready to meet up after a couple of e-mails, then please don't waste my time by e-mailing me in the first place. Thanks a million!!!!

GoOd LuCk!!!

I'll buy you a couple of those fancy drinks with the umbrella hanging out, and tantalize you with my quick wit and knowledge of meaningless but entertaining facts.