heres a little update: i currently have one on the hook but, don't let that stop you from contacting me. you just have to keep it discrete or, if you happen to like women, we can have threesome. how hot and open minded can one man be? i wish i could just date myself sometimes.


i think i'll try a little something different here.
please, please, PLEASE, only crazy women contact me. the more cats you have, the better.
hygiene is not an issue. don't wash your feet, brush your teeth, or shave your arm pits.
you must be at least 20 yrs older than me but, your profile says you are younger than me. i love to be kept guessing, it keeps my mind sharp.
you must be of average weight (average is about 350 lbs for those of you that don't know). lets get together for some pbr.
good luck ladies and please stay in single file.

my ideal date would be to sit on my couch on the porch, chain smoke buglers, drink pabst blue ribbon until we can't walk, watch a little nascar (#3 r.i.p.) while wearing matching kid rock jerseys with yellow arm pits. maybe we could fight on the front lawn until the cops come then we get on my piss stained mattress for some meaningless sex.
i'll be more than happy to drive you home afterwards. well, really i'll just leave you at the nearest gas station after i send you in for some gum. when you come back out, POOF your dream man will be gone. yes, i'm very romantic BuuurP!