First of all, I am NOT 51!! That is apparently a typo on somebody's part!!! I am a 61 year old teacher from the Panhandle of Florida with 3 grown kids who hide from me. I am extremely reclusive having learned that...so far...I've enjoyed my own company more than anyone else's. I got so weary of ads by some unconscious man MY AGE who has a "few extra pounds" but who was looking for a "slim/petite" CHILD the approximate age of his junior high school grandaughter. These were the things he HOPED they would enjoy together: driving his tractor, the music of Perry Como, library rentals of Jack Benny LIVE, and her putting BenGay on his shoulders at nite while wearing her little see-thru negligee with the rolling eyes of the Power Puff girls on the bodice. Hello????? I am a 61 year old who LOOKS like a 61 year old. I have been known to look like a 71 (!) year old after dealing with the above. I have learned to pat them on the head (or belly) and send them on their pathetic way. I often see them about 18 months later crying in their beer about the little 19 year old he married and found that she and her wantabe rock star boyfriend had absconded with his life's savings. What a surprise. You won't find me in a bikini, on a skateboard, or liable to jump up and bring you your spitcup on demand. But for all my sass and bravado, I am a woman who loves men, but I won't be taken for granted or dismissed. I won't act dumb to make your head swell. I will be stupid sometimes but if you feed and water me properly, I will prove to be a very wise emotional investment. I do not, however, respond to emails without photos. Also, if you are looking for a one-night stand, a woman who will sprawl out on a silver platter and offer herself up for the price of a dinner, or someone who loves to be groped and pawed, then let's not waste my time or yours 'cause hey, it's NOT going to happen.

A quiet evening over coffee and conversation would work for me.