Well, in my lame attempt to address a few issues that have crept up lately, I have inadvertently deleted my entire spiel. Crap! It was complete with a dainty little description of my likes/dislikes and who I am as a person along with translations (much like the one in the next section that WASN'T deleted!) in a not-so-indirect format. Something kinda like.. I love animals, NEED an easy-going guy, you have to be able to spell common words correctly, and that includes there/their/they're, know the difference between then and than, etc... no losers that use commas instead of apostrophes (don't be hatin'!). There was something to the effect of, "I intend to spend a good portion of my day planted on the couch watching the tube and my activity level isn't likely to change" and "if I do care to wander outdoors it's usually to see a movie, browse the Goodwill stores, or snag some yummers" although, not in those words, I think you catch my drift. I do love to camp (it's alot like sitting on the couch, only outside), read, write stories, go boating, stuff like that (cuz writing and boating are so similar- NOT). I also love to travel and take road trips, go to cultural events, browse museums and libraries, and go to the zoo or anywhere there are animals (I even go to Petsmart just to hold the ferrets!).

I seek an intelligent, kind-hearted, comedian type that doesn't get riled up easily, has an even temper, and no small children, please (ages 12 and over okay). Bring all the animals you want on over but keep the little ones wich yo mama! Just kidding, I won't date men with small children (more hatin'!). I expect honesty at all times (not when I ask if I look fat or if this zit is noticeable) and cheaters will not be tolerated (once a relationship has been established, of course). TRANSLATION: If you've never been faithful to anyone in your life, don't try turning a new leaf with me, mkay? I don't play games, I don't entertain drama and I don't want yours. If you're a thrill-seeker and need constant conflict you won't find it here, only the door.

Is anybody left? Are you hot? (I'll settle for kinda cute!) Are you "considerate" of others? TRANSLATION: Are you aware that fun time is not a race and you don't win a prize for finishing first?

Yeah, I know, I'm tired, I should have gone to bed hours ago but I wanted to see how many commas I could use in one, long, drawn-out, run-on sentence. Huh, six, I can do better. Someday I might condense this mess into something actually reasonable but for now, I think I've run off all the fellers I wouldn't want to date anyway, which is really the point of this whole charade, isn't it? If you're still with me, let me know, for Pete's sake write me! Write it NOW! It doesn't matter what you write, only that you let me know you're alive!

IMPORTANT BULLETIN: UNCOOL TO POST WITH YOUR KIDS ON THIS SITE WHERE POTENTIAL PREDATORS LURK. KIDS SHOULD NOT BE USED AS SALES TOOLS TO MARKET YOURSELF. PLEASE PETITION POF TO CHANGE THEIR POLICY ON POSTINGS WITH CHILDREN TO AT LEAST MASK OUT THEIR FACES IF POSTED. FOR WIDER COVERAGE OF THIS MESSAGE, PLEASE COPY & PASTE INTO YOUR OWN PROFILE...THANKS..

Call me old-fashioned but dinner and a movie sound great to me. You get a chance to get to know each other a bit over dinner and if things are going well, a chance to snuggle or hold hands in the dark. If things are going badly, well, at least you can ignore who you're with and watch the movie, right? Win/win! TRANSLATION: I don't drink, please do not ask me to meet you for drinks. See above about activity levels, you're really going to have to be something to get my lazy ass to go rollerblading with you on a first date!

Male
Age between 27 and 43
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