I am kind of short and dumpy, work all the time and am looking for someone who likes to have fun. I would like to date women such as Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders or Hollywood Starlettes but would be happy with a female who speaks English and doesn't have too bad body odor. My hobbies include trying different hats on in front of a mirror, predicting the weather and making flavored ice cubes.

I am not looking for a woman who is just interested in showing me off as her, "Trophy Date" to impress her girlfriends and co-workers. Well, okay. I would do that if there was free beer.

I do not have a Harley, if you are looking for a guy to go riding around with on the back of his bike with your hair flowing freely in the breeze- unless you are wearing a helmet. But feel free to send pictures of yourself wearing tight black leather Harley clothing. Or one where you are wearing a bikini. Or dressed up in an outfit like the woman on the flying trapeze at the circus wears. If you happen to have a picture where you are dressed up as Wonder Woman, that would be okay.

I'm a good cook, paint, write and watch football games.

On a first date I would like to meet for a drink in a relaxed place. Since a first date can sometimes be awkward having a beer in front of me would be relaxing. Or I might bring a hand puppet to bridge the conversation between us. Having the drink at an outdoor pub on a nice day would be great. I have also been trying to learn the art of plate spinning to entertain a dinner date at a fancy restaurant.