I'm holed up in an oceanfront bungalow working on my upcoming Pulitzer Prize-winning profile, but I have OCD and can't seem to quit licking things around me, so it's a slow and arduous task.
Here's a preview of my upcoming profile:
I stay away from
men cause they are
. But I'm no
either!
It's okay if you like to
,
, or
, but please—all in moderation. I couldn't handle a
.
I'm not looking for a
, a
animal, someone who likes to
or who is
,
, or
.
Other ethnicities, such as
or
are fine, but if you make me
or
or even
, I'd just have to
yer a$$ to the curb. I'd just like to find a guy that I think is a
. That would be
in my book! Then we could
each other and make googlie-eyes like this-->>
at each other.
If you make me
perhaps I'd
you, and if all goes well, we'd both feel like this -->>
. If we really hit it off then we'd see these -->>
and do this
!
Oh frick! Not now! I'm busy licking this stuff and trying to turn out an award-winning profile!
)
)
)
)