Hi, if I had any friends they would probably say I'm wierd. This is mainly because I live in an old mansion with my 200 cats, and I only eat tuna and liqourice. But deep down I know that there's more to life, and if I can ever literally break these chains ( because mum keeps me in shackles )then I want to meet new people.
You must;
Like liqourice, tuna, cats, and re-runs of Sweeney.
p.s I don't live with my mum, because its my dad, he's a tranny really.
I hate being 6ft5 because I can never get stilletos to fit!
If you want to know anything that even resembles the truth then leave me a message x

I would take you to Monaco for the weekend. We would wine and dine in the finest resturants, and I would accommodate you on my yacht. Before we fly back via Paris to soak in the moonlight on the Eiffel Tower.
Failing that, would a bag of chips at mi nans impress you ?