Alrighty let's cut to the chase. You love golf; golf makes my eyes glaze over. You love NASCAR; I despise it and everyone who think it's remotely entertaining. You're into that Harley mystique; loud motorcycles compel me towards an almost murderous rage. You want a Barbie doll with a refrigerator full of beer who knows how to gut a fish; I want a real man without a beer gut who brings me sushi fish on a silver platter. Next!
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Fast-forward to the next profile for the gratuitous cleavage shot.

ME: Urbane hillbilly; outgoing introvert; agnostically devout. All this, plus I've practically elevated picking up stuff with my toes to an art form. YOU: Smart; a slightly twisted sense of humor; goal-oriented and optimistic. Extra points if you're an equestrian pilot who can teach me to swear in Italian. Stronza!! Vaffanculo!! Let's start there and discover the rest. No perverts, please. You know who you are.

UPDATE: I'm here mainly for the forums. It's like the Jerry Springer Show, but without the shouting. Sorta restores my faith in the human race. In cyberspace, no one can hear you scream. LOL. I tried to pick "Single/Not Looking" but apparently this option is not available. Not sure I'm interested in dating... because somehow, while I wasn't looking, "dating" morphed into something like "ma'am, here's a bag of condoms and a CVS card; in what order would you like to use these?" All reasonable options for intelligent life in my neck of the woods have been exhausted (well, that didn't take long!). If you think not... well then, let 'er rip! Even better, I'd welcome the opportunity to emigrate to New Zealand. Hey my passport is burning a hole in my back pocket. Indiana, more than just a state fair.

I have a demanding career that keeps my rear tied to a desk, a phone, a computer, and business-class airline seats, but I'd rather be outdoors... preferably doing something that involves horses, a totally sweet digital SLR, a kayak, or airplane noise. I never met a dirt road I didn't like. I'm looking for a man so dang fine he'll call me sweetiepie (hopefully, not followed by "get me a beer") and mean it.... a bona-fide character with a sense of unpretentious class as well as vision and imagination, and a desire to reach out. Plus if you've got an old truck or an old tractor that I could drive around I think I'd be pretty much glazed over for about a week. ;)

As a libertarian, I occasionally find myself totally obsessed with politics but not so much so that it interferes with my ability to be completely apathetic about it three hours later. Viva la revolucion but I have my priorities, one of which is to find a place that actually feels like home to me and ultimately, to have somebody to share it with. C'mon, we can play shotgun golf on the back 40, talk to the horses and devise elaborate booby-traps for them pesky revenuers sneakin' up the driveway. Uh huh. Oh, the story we could tell about the one that almost got away.

I really appreciate creative, intelligent people. I like individualists, non-conformists, contrarians, artsy-fartsies, gay interior designers, trauma surgeons, ninjas, test pilots, honest lawyers, horse doctors, guitar pickers, and mad scientists. You don't have to be any of those to write. I have giant flightless birds, bizarro chickens, screaming peacocks, beautiful foot-long koi, three funny dogs and one wild baby-eating dingo. If you think you can make friends with us all, come on down!

An ether binge in Las Vegas.