I just saw a Cialis commercial. The disclaimer at the end says that side effects may include loss of sight or hearing and if you experience this, you are to call your doctor immediately. It got me thinking: If you lose your hearing and call your doctor, how will you know whether or not he answers the phone?
And while I'm on the topic of commercials, have you seen that one for the deodorant, where the guy comes in from a run, throws his shirt on the bed and hops in the shower? His wife grabs the shirt, smells it, then says "Andrew, I thought you went running! Your shirt is dry and it doesn't even smell bad!" And we're supposed to believe that this deodorant works that well?!? Let me tell you...I run...and when I run I sweat! (In fact, that's the biggest reason WHY I run! To sweat! Burn baby burn!!!!) No deodorant in the world is gonna stop that...sure, maybe under the arms, but what about his back, his neck, his stomach?? Furthermore, if his shirt is dry and it doesn't smell bad, WHY IS HE SHOWERING??? Oh, he went for a run all right... a run down the street to do the dirty with the desperate housewife in the bungalow at the end of the block!

I was at Save-On the other day and saw some toilet pape by the name of Seventh Generation.
I don't thnk I want to know how they came up with that name

Wanted: surrogate mom for mellow, four-year-old border collie/sheltie cross. An eternal pup and a typical attention hound. He loves his dad but needs some maternal nurturing. Comes complete with 46-year-old caregiver.
I am a romantic at heart. If a handyman is what you're looking for, can't help you there. I'm a danger to myself and those around me with power tools in my hand. However, if romance is what you like, that's more my style. I like to buy flowers for no other reason than to see the smile they produce. I'd love to get to know the local florist on a first-name basis (yeah yeah ok she's hot...but that's not what I mean). I'll listen to hints dropped, even if they aren't hints at all and maybe next time we meet that new pair of slippers, or DVD set you had said you wanted in passing while we were out shopping will show up on your kitchen table. I love surprises (the good kind) and love to give them. Not that I'm independently wealthy and can shower you with gifts, far from it - if journalists made a lot of money they would all retire by 55 and trust me, there are a LOT of old journalists out there (ha ha).

***** Hi there: This is the dog talking. I just wanted to say that my owner is real cool and all but he kinda needs some company. He's starting to look at me real strange-like at night and I'm feeling a bit uncomfortable about that.****
Sorry about that. My dog is very opinionated.

Ah yes, my dog. He's like the canine equivalent of Mahatma Gandhi. If another dog were to attack him and bite his paw, Guinness would offer his other paw to be bit as well, just so the pain could be balanced. You hear about the "Alpha Male" of a pack? Guinness is the "Omega Male". That's cool though. I'll keep him.
Those who know me agree that I have a great sense of humour. I can generally relieve the tension in a room with my humour and quick wit (unless of course I'm the cause of the tension in the room...hey, stuff happens). I am a kind, caring and focused man. I went back to university in 1998 and started over. Now I'm doing what I've always wanted to do. I'm a hard worker and very dedicated to my career, but am not the type to bring my work home.
I love most sports, with the possible exception of cricket, as I've yet to meet either of the two people in the world who completely understand the game.
I come from a large family and love children, although at this point in my life I have come to the realization that it's unlikely I will ever have any of my own.
I'm different than most men. For instance: I've yet to meet a brunette whom I think looks better as a blonde. In fact, I think if I were ever to meet a blonde who had the guts to dye her hair brown, that would be perfect woman ha ha. Not saying I am partial to brunettes, or that I have anything against blondes: I just like individuality ... the "against the flow" personality.
I love all sorts of outdoor activities, with golf being right up there on the list, although I don't get out to the course very often. I love to read (mainly mysteries); in fact, I started working on my first novel last summer. I hope to have it completed by the time I am 65. At this rate, I am right on schedule.
I'm not afraid of the kitchen, although cooking for one is sometimes more of a chore than it's worth. I would rather cook a feast for four than a meal for myself.
Oh yeah! I planted a garden this year - my first one ever. I haven't got a clue what I'm doing. Seriously, I've never even used a hoe before!. Ummmm....that just sounds so wrong on so many levels (but true on ANY level). What I mean is I've never planted a seed before. Hmmm...that doesn't sound any better, really. Ok scratch that too. At any rate, with a lot of luck I'll have a whole bunch of tomatoes, potatoes, cukes, onions, red and orange peppers and beets by August. I haven't yet figured out what I'm going to do with all that food. Maybe I'll open one of those roadside stands. Then again, in order to do that I'd have to buy a panel van with three bald tires and make a whole bunch of hand-painted signs to post along the highway..."fresh veggies, 500m"...."fresh veggies, 250m". And I suppose I'd also I have to find a source for some crayfish for those "fresh LOBSTER tails, 6 for $10" deals. Sounds like too much work. Maybe I should stop watering the plants right now. What have I gotten myself into???

A sense of humour is extremely important. If you can't laugh, we'll never get along. If my introduction did not bring a smile to your face at some point, then I'm afraid you are too serious for me. (Must suck to be like that.)
If you golf, we are sure to hit it off. Unless of course you regularly shoot in the 80s. Then you're just a show-off.
I love playing baseball, but nowadays my participation is relegated to slow-pitch. I lost an eye a few years ago (hockey) and trying to hit curve balls with no depth perception generally leads to embarrassing results.
OK wanna know more? email me. Like most people on this site, my IMs usually do not work.
And no, you can't just have the dog.

If you're on 200 favourites lists, I won't make it 201. Clearly we are on here for different reasons.
If your top three favourite things are all television shows, I am not the guy for you.

As for the debate "is marijuana considered drugs", it is in my books, so if you are a 40-something pothead, I'm not the guy for you.

http://www.baseball-almanac.com/players/player.php?p=kalinal01