i would be fibbing if i said i haven't done this before so let's start off on the right foot. single mom of a beautiful 12 year old daughter who's well being and safety means everything. she has taught me more ways to laugh out loud than i can ever count.

now i can only hope that half of those out there can hardly top my first few dates. the first gentleman after a few months of seemingly honest and general conversation drove a few hours to take me to dinner..little did i know he had NO legs..a small fact that must have slipped his mind. NOT THAT IT WAS ANY BIG DEAL we all have our issues to work with but, he could have trusted enough to allow me to use my own judgement about the matter...i carried thru my end of the date but, please, please, please don't take me to WAFFLE HOUSE for dinner.

date #2 decided it was approprate to follow me to my bedroom while i excused myself to the bathroom for one last glamour check before leaving for dinner and you might figure i was shocked to find him sprawled across my bed (my bath is in my room) wearing only a black satin thong SOOOO GROSSSSS and so unmanly..only thing i could do after i burst out laughing was cover my eyes and warn him that he should see his way out and to put on his pants while doing so!!!what on earth was he thinking??? no worries i had my (at that time roommate and neighbor police officer there yet wouldn't you have thought they would have asked him where he was heading when i went to the restroom)?

#3 and grand finaly my date met me at a restuarant and mid way thru dinner and his drink he decided it was appropriate to run his hand up my skirt as though to tickle my tonsils...well, i stood up at the speed of light and loudly warned him OH NO YOU DID NOT EVEN GO THERE" and he wore my coke out of the restuarant while the wait staff applauded and i got to pay the check...now tell me true..how much worse could it get...so i took a long vacation and decided i can't hold everyman accountable for the ignorance of a few.. but, have i actually been on a date since then. NOPE, my best date and safest by far is sitting home on a Friday night in my jammies eating frozen yogurt with my daughter...or going to borders on a saturday evening with her wearing jeans and flip flops and holding up in the corner with her in one of those huge round chairs and simply sipping a chia, and getting lost in tons of books and magazines and quiet laughter.

*I HAVE BEEN ASKED THIS QUESTION!! could i have weeded them out any better...WELL THESE DATES DID NOT OCCUR ON A WHIM AND WERE well into a FEW MONTHS JUST TALKING AND EMAILING THEREFORE ..if i weeded them anyfurther i would have had to use a flour sifter and a pair of tweezers...TRUST IS A MUST...honesty and integrity seemed to have failed them in their pursuit..WOULDN'T YOU AGREE?

i don't want to find a mr.america, or a man of great wealth because money matters very little to me, or someone who loves himself more than anyone else ever could..i just really hope that the man that is looking for me is just as simple by nature as me and my daughter and looks inside to know me with complete honesty because that is exactl how i look inside of someone else.

anything that makes me laugh as long as you have all your limbs, wear manly underwear (and that much i don't want to know) and keep your hands to yourself. i don't do random acts of physical kindness with people i don't know .....

laughter is a good start