The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon taking luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... It's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it...

I consider myself a good person and someone who's fun to hang out with. I'm really easy going and tend to get along with all types of people. Self amusement is key!! I'm serious when i have to be, but i find it a lot more fun to find a comical side about the aspects of life. I'm a huge tattoo fanatic. I laugh at people that decorate everything they can possibly think of but don't have the balls to decorate their own skin!!

Something fun that doesn't involve long periods of silence like a movie or some standard boring sh#t like that. A really tacky carnival would be cool!!! Maybe toss a few gutter balls at the local bowling alley.....